Dlisted: 08/13/2006 - 08/20/2006

Saturday, August 19, 2006

I Can See Her Implants



Blohan partied with friends yesterday in Malibu. She showed us her fake tits and the fact that homegirl has no ass. For being as young as she is, she has a pretty shitty body. I guess crack will do that to you.

That whole scene looks so annoying. Being around all these sluts just on their cell phones talking about Kitson, Pure in Las Vegas and how fucking edgy they are. I'd pray for a Tsunami.







This is Who Blohan is Banging



No, not the woman...yet

This is a clip from The Daily Show back in June of this year. It shows Blohan's latest boy toy, Harry Morton being interviewed for his Pink Taco restaurant. He's cute enough, but isn't the sharpest tool in the shed.

[Thx Deniz]

She's Looked A Lot Worse!



I'm going to cut this bitch a break. Melanie Griffith doesn't look that frightening as she attends the Imagen Awards last night in Los Angeles. I'm not sure what the Imagen awards are, but I'm going to take a guess and say it involves plastic surgery in which Melanie would win the "most improved". That tattoo is still the fugliest ever. That is not how you show love.


She is One Sexy Bitch



Britney Spears and SPF created a media frenzy at Fred Segal in Los Angeles yesterday. Brit decided to dress for the paps and traded in her hot platform flip-flops for heels and a white dress. Damn she's so hot, I just want to jump her! You know she'd be into squirting her breast milk into my ahole. On that note, I'm off to kill myself.







Hot Slut of the Day!





Allison Kelly from Project Runway 3

Birthday Sluts



John Stamos (43)
Lil' Romeo (17)
Erika Christensen (24)
Fat Joe (36)
Matthew Perry (37)
LeAnn Womack (40)
Kevin Dillon (41)
Kyra Sedgwick (41)
Adam Arkin (50)
Peter Gallagher (51)
Tipper Gore (58)
Bill Clinton (60)

How Do You Fix Wonky Eye?


Paris Hilton at an in-store signing at Best Buy in Los Angeles on August 18th

Friday, August 18, 2006

Photoshop is Already a Friend of Suri Cruise



My favorite source of gossip, Popbitch, claims that a Vanity Fair staffer spilled the beans on Suri Cruise.

A source from the Vanity Fair shoot of Suri Cruise says the baby looks enough like Cruise and Holmes for their parentage to be plausible, but that it is a bit of a runt, and required 21 days of photography, plus three days of digital touching-up, before the magazine and celebrity parents had a cover image they liked.


Sick! 21 days of shooting? Are they doing an homage to The Ten Commandments? Actually, that would be kind of hot.

Panty Creamer of the Day: Boy George


Boy George on day 5 of his community service in NYC on August 18th





They are Such Comedians



I'm guessing that Tara Reid and her pals either received these t-shirts at the even they were at or they just came back from a Spencer's gift store. They think are so funny. That's what cheap drugs will do to you. Tara points out that her friend is wearing a tee that says "Been In a Hilton."

It would be funnier if it said "Been in a Hilton and all I got was a lousy STD"



Afternoon Crumbs



Good Catholics use condoms [Popbytes]

Porno tube rules [BWE]

Winona Ryder gets revenge on a bully [Hollywood Rag]

Hot chicks at the SOAP premiere [Egotastic!]

Owen Wilson & Kate Hudson's morning after [Cityrag]

Aretha Franklin is gigantic [Concrete Loop]

Fergie shouldn't perform by herself [Hollywood Tuna]

I know you can't get enough of Richie eating pizza [IDLYITW]

For real, what is wrong with Keira Knightley's boyfriend? [Just Jared]

Oh how I missed Cisco Adler [Popsugar]

Ok, now I really missed Gabriel Aubry [A Socialite's Life]

Guess the Ho?



UPDATE - Click here to see the ho behind the smile. Congrats to Anna for getting it right first!

Finally She's Sedated



Courtney Love looks like a beautiful disaster as she escorts her daughter, Frances Bean, to Rumer Willis' birthday party. She has no idea what she's doing or where she's going? I bet she has the mad drools. Sedation does that to you.

[People]

Blohan is Really Serious About Her Career




Lindsay at Smashbox Studios in L.A. on August 15th

Friends of Lindsay Blohan are saying that she's learned her lesson and is curbing her partying ways to focus on her film career. She has apparently stopped going out as much and instead hangs out with her boyfriend, Harry Morton in an effort to clean up.

The turning point came when she received a letter from her boss at Morgan Creek.

A source said: "It was a turning point. She realized it was a matter of either stepping up or stepping down."

"Lindsay took this seriously; she takes her career seriously. She has been going home early every night and [arriving] at work on time since the letter"


Pff, I give it a week. Kicking heroin and crack takes much more than missing a few parties a week.

UPDATE - I had to remove the photos y'all, but here's one from People.

[AHN]

"Am I in UsWeekly Today?!?" - JLove



JLove knows that one day she'll be just as cool as Tori and grace the pages of this magazine! Seriously, she's photographed with one like every other day.

[Photo: x17]

The Odd Couple



What are Michael Stipe and Michael Douglas doing together or is that CZJ without her wig and make-up. Anyway, this odd couple spent some time together and grabbed an ice cream cone on the Italian island of Ponzo.

The two performers caused quite a stir in the sleepy harbour town of Ponza Porto as they checked out some of the local shops. And the renowned musician and his actor friend also took time out to indulge in a sweet treat in a local 'gelateria' or ice cream shop, much to the delight of the other holidaymakers who enjoyed an unexpected brush with stardom.


WTF?!

[Hello]

Which is Gayer?




Ricky Martin at a MTV Unplugged press conference in Miami, FL on August 17th

Is Jennifer Hudson Oscar Bound?



American Idol reject, Jennifer Hudson, beat out Idol winner, Fantasia, for the role of Effie White in the silver screen version of Dreamgirls. Earlier screenings have people already talking about Jennifer being nominated and winning the Oscar for best supporting actress. It's a bit premature if you ask me. Nominations don't come out until January or February?

The film will be released this December and will probably turn her into a superstar.

But..is it just me or does she look just a little like Juwanna Mann?



[LA Times]

Does She Even Remember What Her Old Body Looked Like?



Britney Spears told People Magazine that she can't wait to get back to her old body. She desperately wants to pop her second baby out so she can start working on getting her toned arms back.

She said: 'I'm so excited to sweat like I used to - now I can't because you're always kind of scared, just kind of protective."

'I'm so excited about getting my body back and getting a routine scheduled. I'm definitely going to start working out in a huge way.'

What exactly does she mean by "working out"? I think all Britney has to do is stop drinking those 10,000 calorie Starbucks Frappuccinos and homegirl will be ok. She probably pours that shit on her cookie crisp in the morning time.

Is it just me or does her hair look seriously weird in these pics? SPF is hot.

[Monsters and Critics]


The "Who Cares?" News!!



Pete Doherty....yeah I think you know the rest.

Obla dee obla dah...Kellie Martin is expecting!

Debbie Gibson and Lorenzo Lamas think if they combine their Dlevelness, it will take them to at least C level status.

Somebody has finally gotten fed up with Anna Wintour and fired her as a client. In unrelated news a man was found floating in the Hudson with a vintage Halston pump stuck up his rear end.

Pam Anderson's Skankiness Kills Flowers!



Pamela Anderson made a visit to the vet's office for a routine check-up on herself. She showed up barefoot and managed to kill some flowers that couldn't stand her skank odor.

Yes, I know those flowers are naturally like that! Am I that stupid? Don't answer that.

In case you care, she got hitched again to Kid Rock in Nashville. Yawn, shouldn't they spend more time on their careers?

See more pics of her ass at x17!

UPDATE - I didn't even notice her belly! Damn, I'm not on it today. Ewww, that baby is going to be fug.

BREAKING NEWS!!! Ashton & Demi Never Argue!



Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore are coming up on their first wedding anniversary and everything is still as perfect as perfect can be. Ashton told Parade Magazine that their relationship is like any other and believe it or not, they just don't fight.

"We had one argument in the first three months of dating, and since then we haven't had any. We deal with issues before they become arguments."

Maybe it's because they are both too stupid to argue. When it starts they forgot what the hell they were talking about and instead try on each other's clothes and have a fashion show or reenact scenes from Ghost, but they fight over who gets to be Whoopi.

[People]

Are You Ready for Some Snakes on a Motherf**kin' Plane?!



The movie event of the year is here. Snakes on a Plane opens nationwide today. What has become an internet cult classic will finally find itself on a much broader playing field. The premiere was held last night and man were the stars out. And by stars I mean the snakes.

Seriously, I feel like I don't need to see this movie since I've seen like 50 trailers clips of this thing!!! I mean, it's about people on a plane with some snakes and then they kill the snakes and voila! Right?

The Dlisted Report



Daniel Craig (James Bond) has signed on to the The Golden Compass which is the first film in a trilogy. Craig will play Lord Asriel, a ruthless and mysterious adventurer who is the uncle of Lyra Belacqua, the young girl who journeys to a parallel universe to save her best friend. Eva Green and Nicole Kidman also star. Shooting begins September 4th in the UK. [Variety]

Susan Sarandon and Helena Bonham Carter will play the title roles in Eleanor and Colette. Marc Bruce Rosin's script follows Sarandon's Eleanor, a patient at a psychiatric institute, who retains Colette (Bonham Carter), an attorney, to represent her complaint against the hospital, which has been prescribing her psychopharmacological drugs. During the lengthy process, the two women bond and form a special friendship. Shooting begins next Spring in San Francisco, Vancouver and Germany. [Production Weekly]

Michael Gondry (Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind) has cast Mos Def, Mia Farrow and Melonie Diaz in Be Kind Rewind. The film also stars Jack Black. Black will portray a goofball who becomes magnetized trying to sabotage a power plant and then erases all the tapes in the videostore while visiting a pal (played by Mos Def) who works there and his co-worker (Diaz). The friends then re-create and refilm every movie that the store's only loyal customer decides to rent. Shooting starts next month in NJ. [Variety]



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