Dlisted: 07/30/2006 - 08/06/2006

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Let's Hope There's Cover Girl on That List



Julia Roberts doesn't give a fuck what people think. She goes outside looking like a damn mess, but who cares? She's worth like a gazillion dollars. On that note, I hope she's using some of that money to buy some damned concealer at least! I'm all for being comfortable, but homegirl looks like she's about to teach kindergarten.

[x17]





Zayra Alvarez is Really Hot



Rock Star: Supernova is a pretty shitty show, but Zayra Alvarez makes it worth it. This is one hot bitch if I've ever seen one. She gives Bai Ling a run for her money in the singing department, but she can put on a show. And don't get me started on the outfits. Legendary. Unfortunately, the World isn't ready for her talents. She's always in the bottom 3.

Here is she butchering the hell out of 867-5309 Jenny, but looking mighty hot. If you watch this show, please vote for her! I'll owe you one.

Is MK Olsen Homeless?


MK at Chateau Marmont in Los Angeles on August 2, 2006






[Photos: x17]

Hot Slut of the Month: CoCo



Ice-T's main ho, CoCo, secured over 30% of your votes to be the hottest bitch on Dlisted for July. Her wit, talent, beauty, smarts and fashion sense has taken her far.

Thanks for voting y'all!

The Gayest Tshirts on the Gayest Family



These are t-shirts that Apple made and sold in the 80s. Seriously, this is high fashion. I think Mr. Lagerfeld is sketching his heart out with the inspiration he's receiving from this photo.

I'm sorry, it's a slow day!

[Scary Ideas] via [Goldenfiddle]

Which Couple is More Exciting?



Dominic & Evangeline or Chicken & Waffles?

The Must-See Event of the Decade!



This is seriously going to be the hottest show in the history of hot shows. Joan Collins and Linda Evans will reunite to star in Legends! which will begin their National tour on September 12, 2006 in Toronto. They will play 14 dates before landing on Broadway or London. According to a press release, Legends! "centers on two somewhat desperate and waning movie stars named Sylvia (Collins) and Leatrice (Evans). Both actresses are courted by an unscrupulous young producer to star together in a Broadway show, despite the fact that they have hated each other for decades. He convinces both ladies to go along by misleading them into believing that they will be starring in the show with Paul Newman. This hilarious set-up provides the background for the full-blown comic confrontation between these two divas and the surprising and hilarious resolution."

The show will play the following dates:

Sept. 12-Oct. 22 in Toronto at the Royal Alexandra Theatre
Oct. 24-Nov. 5 in Philadelphia at The Forrest Theatre
Nov. 7-12 in Hartford at the Bushnell
Nov. 14-19 in East Lansing at the Wharton Center
Nov. 21-Dec. 3 in Washington, D.C. at the National Theatre
Dec. 5-10 in Kansas City at the Lyric Theatre
Jan. 9-14, 2007 in San Diego at the Civic Center
Jan. 16-28 in Los Angeles at the Wadsworth
Feb. 20-March 4 in Chicago at The LaSalle
March 20-April 1 in Cleveland at the Palace Theatre
April 10-15 in Fayetteville at the Walton Arts Center
April 24-29 in Ft. Myers at the Barbara Mann PAC
May 1-6 in Raleigh at the BTI Center
May 8-13 in New Haven at the Shubert Theatre

I seriously am into this. It's either going to be amazing or a serious shipwreck. I can totally picture Joan Collins completely messing up her lines and flipping out! However, I expect the glamour factor to be in full force.

Leo DiCaprio & Cat Deeley?



Is Leonardo DiCaprio dating So You Think You Can Dance? host, Cat Deeley? The pair have been seen out on a few dates in Los Angeles. Just last week, Leo was seen with his ex-girlfriend, Gisele Bundchen.

The pair met at a Beverly Hills restaurant when Leo overheard Cat talking about the possibility of posing nude. He was charmed by her accent and her fresh-face.

A source said: "Leo was attracted by Cat's fresh-faced looks and English accent.

"She looks very different from an identikit Los Angeles girl"


[Female First]

Hot Slut of the Day!



Gavin MacLeod

Birthday Sluts



Loni Anderson (61)
Johnathan Silverman (40)
Tawny Kitaen (45)
Pat Smear (41)
Faith Prince (49)
Maureen McCormick (50)
Erika Slezak (60)

Friday, August 04, 2006

Why Do I Love Danity Kane?!



Here is the debut video of Diddy's manufactured girl group, Danity Kane. I don't know why it is I love them so much? Maybe, it's Aubrey. Their group name has to be the worst ever.

[Thanks Jon]

Tommy Lee Quote of the Day!



"I get plane-ons, cab-ons, limoons... My dick is hard all the time. I'm like, 'Is that OK? Is there something wrong with me?' I don't think that's normal."

Afternoon Crumbs



Pamela Anderson is such a demure bride [Gays of Our Lives]

Stephanie Tanner asks you to strip [BWE]

Britney gets help from Charlie Sheen for her clothing line [Celebrity Nation]

Asshole Simpson shows us her cotton [Egotastic!]

There's the boob belt again [Hollywood Tuna]

A tranny or Mimi? [Popsugar]

Everyone is mad at Vadge [A Socialite's Life]

Damn, Mandy Moore is getting chunky [Just Jared]

This is why I love Britney Spears [IDLYITW]

Kate Moss buys a stuffed titty [Hollywood Rag]

Oh how I miss Valerie Cherish [Popbytes]

I need to see Phony Braxton's Vegas shipwreck [Concrete Loop]

Guess the Ho?



UPDATE
- Click here to see the ho behind the mouth. Congrats to Darknessa for being the first to get it right.

What Happened to the Supermodels?!


Naomi Campbell

Did W Magazine have no budget for this photoshoot on fashion's biggest supermodels of the past? The lighting is awful and they seriously could've used a team of photoshop people. Naomi is straight-up fright night! She's a dude in a cheap wig. Christie Brinkley looks like she's had way too many dolls. I just can't comment.

Click here to see more horrific madness


Cindy Crawford


Christie Brinkley


Rachel Hunter

Blohan's New Dude



Who knows who this guy is? It could be someone she shagged that night or a new gay. Anyway, Blohan showed him off at the X Games party last night. She looks better, but still glazed over. I think she needs to stay in and make it a Blockbuster night every now and again.

Update - A Dlisted reader wrote this to me:

I was at the X games party at Avalon last night. I happened to be in the bathroom with Lindsay and parked myself into the stall next to her. Seconds after she went in, I heard all sorts of snorts. I also noticed that her toes were facing towards the toilet. She was in there for a few minutes and came out wiping her nose.

UPDATE II - A reader has the skinny on the mystery dude.

his name is scott thomas. he is in a band called ringside. he is also
married with three kids...




Eva LongWHORIA Was Dropped as a Baby



Eva LongWHORIA has to be the most delusional woman on this planet. All she talks about is how it's so hard to be beautiful and how it's so hard to be successful. Um...she's been around like a quick minute and suddenly she's an A-lister. Dumb ho! She recently said that she'd rather have kids than an Oscar. Um...was the latter even an option?

"My priorities are different. The most important thing to me is not work - it's to have a family. I want to be a mother. I want to get married. I want to raise kids."

"I'd much rather have a family than win an Oscar."

She promises that when the show (Desperate Bitches) ends she will return to Texas to start her family. Why wait? There's no time like the present!

Ewwww, she's going to get sooo fat when she gets knocked up. Fat and smelly.

[The Mirror] [Thx Loozer]

Is Barney Heading for the Oven?!



I must say that Barney the Doberman is one hot bitch. He's a stupid bitch, but a hot one. He was hired to protect several expensive and rare teddy bears at an exhibition in England. Among those bears included a $80,000 toy of Elvis Presley's named Mabel.

Well, Barney must've felt anger or lust towards Mabel, because he ripped that ho a part. He also ripped and destroyed several others. He ripped off all their legs and heads and pulled the stuffing out of them. The other bears were worth an estimated $60,000,

Greg West, the security guard on duty at the time is seriously befuddled. He said:

"Barney has been a model guard dog for over six years. I still can't believe what happened.

"Either there was a rogue scent of some kind on Mabel which switched on Barney's deepest instincts, or it could have been jealousy - I was just stroking Mabel and saying what a nice little bear she was."


No word yet on the fate of Barney.

[BBC] [Thx LA's Sister]

Tara Reid Finds Love and Kills a Few Fishes



Tara Reid and a mystery man made beautiful music in Miami. Unfortunately, their happiness probably cost the lives of a few fishes, coral and whatever else lives in the vicinity of their persons. What a selfish cow!

I also think we should put our quarters together to get this ho a decent lipo job.











Britney's "Air" Quotes Start a Trend!



Mimi gave an interview to John Norris for MTV to discuss her upcoming tour. She used Britney's infamous "air quotes" to get her point across. I need to just start using that shit randomly. I should've done this weeks ago, but today is a new day.

If you care enough you can download the entire Mimi interview here. I don't care enough, so tell me how that went.







[Mariah Daily] [Thx Gabe]

Parasite Hilton is Practically a Virgin



Parasite Hilton covers up her wonky eye yet again for the cover of Marie Claire magazine. In the article she talks about how she's misunderstood and not the slut that everyone thinks she is.

She seconds that in an interview for GQ Magazine. She was probably crossing her vagina lips when she said this:

"I've only done it with, like, a couple of boyfriends. People think I sleep with everyone, but I'm not like that. I like kissing, but that's all I do. I'm not having sex for a year, I've decided. I'll kiss but nothing else."

That little minx! She said a couple of BOYFRIENDS. I mean I've only done it with a couple of boyfriends, but I've fucked half of the West Coast!

[Thanks Valerie]

Gayken's New Album to Clear Up his Sexuality



The tracklisting for Gayken's new album, A Thousand Different Ways, which is due September 19th will finally answer the question about his sexuality. The 14 track album features 10 covers and 4 new songs.


"Right Here Waiting," originally recorded by Richard Marx
"When I See You Smile," originally recorded by Bad English
"Without You," originally recorded by Badfinger
"Lonely No More"
"Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word," originally recorded by Elton John
"Everytime You Go Away," originally recorded by Paul Young
"Everything I Do (I Do It For You)," originally recorded by Bryan Adams
"I Want to Know What Love Is," featuring Suzie McNeil; originally recorded by Foreigner
"These Open Arms"
"Because You Loved Me," originally recorded by Celine Dion
"Here You Come Again," originally recorded by Dolly Parton
"Everything I Have," featuring William Joseph
"A Thousand Days"
"Broken Wings," originally recorded by Mr. Mister


With a set list like that...no words need to be spoken. He's said it all.

[Billboard] [Thx Hassan]

Gay Al Better Keep It Outside the House



A neighbor of Star Jones and Gay Al claims that a huge, black guy with a bucket hat rang his buzzer at 4 in the morning looking for Gay Al. The neighbor saw the guy on his security camera that is equipped in each apartment. The neighbor told the man that he had the wrong buzzer.

The neighbor also said that Gay Al loves his spandex: "I know Al. I see him in the elevator all the time - in Spandex,"

OMG, that's hilarious and sick at the same time.

The spokeswhore for the couple claim that they didn't know the man and Star and GA have been getting a lot of harassers looking for them since their address was made public.

Sure...sure...just tell the truth! The man was looking to get paid, because Gay Al forgot to do so when he was being humiliated like the pig bottom he is!

[Page Six]

Brad Pitt Sings...For Charity!

Don't worry Brad Pitt isn't putting out a full-length album just yet. He donated his voice to a benefit CD called Hollywood Goes Wild. The 2001 CD brought several stars together for a really doozy of an album. Brad sings a song called "Midtown".

Click here to get a listen! Below is also yet another Brad performance. This time it's with Edward Norton on the set of Fight Club. Their little diddy is called "The Penis Song". Who knew Norton had a sense of humor?



[Us Weekly]

Jennifer Finds Solace in the Arms of Another!!



Rumors are spewing that Jennifer Aniston has called off her engagement to Vince Vaughn. The two never fully admitted they were a couple. Sources say that Jen is heartbroken that their relationship didn't work out.

I'm not sure what to believe. I just read yesterday that Vince and Jen went out on a double date with Courtney Coxsucker and David Arquette. Anyway...who gives a fig right? Those flowers she has planted on her balcony are ugly. She needs to change those, because they make me sick!

And her new man is so much hotter anyway and probably has a bigger dick!

[Tittle Tattle Too]





That Didn't Last Long!



Posh Beckham must feel naked without polyester hair, because ho went back to extensions! Earlier this week she was spotted with her natural length. I never get it...I mean we all know that isn't her real hair, so what's the point? She honestly looks better all natural, but methinks if she doesn't have at least 5 fake items on her she feels a little out of place.





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