Dlisted: 06/04/2006 - 06/11/2006

Saturday, June 10, 2006

This Ho Works Fast!

Is Denise Richards engaged? According to her left ring finger she is. She arrived at LAX sporting a rock on her wedding band sparking rumors that she's promised to Richie Sambora. Denise is currently involved in an ugly divorce with Charlie Sheen. Richie is also in the process of getting divorced to Heather Locklear. Denise was returning from France where she joined Richie and Bon Jovi on tour.

Sources close to the couple claim she isn't engaged.

Wouldn't that be hot if that was Heather's ring she was wearing. Oh damn, I pray it is. Let the catfight begin!


Valley of the Dlisters

This is what I'm talking about! Why wasn't I in Los Angeles last night at The Renberg Theater for an All-Star reading of Valley of the Dolls. When I say all-star, I mean people who haven't worked this century. I mean if Donna Mills was there, you know the was major wattage. Poor thing, look at that shitty-ass wig. I think a ball of yellow yarn would've looked more believable.

Robert Gant from Queer as Folk was also there! He's hot shit and I still can't get over Donna's tragic wig.

OMG Melissa Joan Hart?! This is an All-Star cast! You know it's the bottom of the barrel just by their outfits. She's had this in her closet from Drive Me Crazy. Red vinyl?! I mean...poor thing needs a gift card to Forever 21, so she can get some new threads.

Mindy FUCKING Cohn! Yes, Nat from Facts of Life. You can't get any bigger than this?! Lindsay Lohan who?

The list goes on and on...Mackenzie Phillips! Not a cute pose for a woman of her age.

The cast also included a few extras from CSI, one of the Kraft service people on Desperate Housewives and a stagehand from The Beauty and the Beast touring company. Seriously, the stars were shining so bright last night at The Renberg Theater you had to wear your blue blockers!

Tobey Maguire is Pregnant!

Not having a baby in Hollywood is like a crime, so Tobey Maguire and his lady, Jennifer Meyer, apparently decided to enter the IN crowd The two started dating in 2003 and became engaged in April. Jennifer is a jewelry designer and the daughter of Ron Meyer, a Universal Studios executive.

A source said: "The big question for them now is do they get married now, before the baby is born, or do they wait so Jennifer can fit into the wedding dress of her dreams!"

I think that baby will be more boring that Violet Affleck and that's pretty boring.

And by the by...I've totally lost track of how many chicks are knocked up in Hollyweird.

[Star Magazine]

Kristin Cavallari's New Bongo Ads

Laguna Beach star Kristin Cavallari is starring in new ads for Bongo. Basically, these were drawn. They straight-up look like cartoons. Why bother even having her pose?

Isn't She Getting a Little Old for This?

Remember when Toni Braxton performed on the American Idol finale and she basically tried to be a sex kitten first and a singer second? While performing with Il Divo at the Adidas World of Football in Berlin her dress caught the wind and blew up revealing her panties. At least she was wearing panties right? She does have a hot body, but that whole "sex kitten" look isn't cute on her. She needs to return to the voice! And wear better panties if you're going to let that happen. Straight up granny panties in the front!

Vivica Fox Confirmed for Dancing with the Stars

Vivica Fox has confirmed that she will compete in Dancing with the Stars 3 this September.

She said: "I'm doing Dancing with the Stars. I'm so excited. I start training for that in July. It's a wonderful opportunity for me to get paid, get in shape, work some outfits and represent for the sistas. Drop it like it's hot!"

Training for Vivica means visiting her plastic surgeon daily.


Hot Slut of the Day!

Lindsay Wagner

Birthday Sluts

Shane West (28)
Tara Lipinski (24)
LeeLee Sobieski (24)
Hoku (25)
Faith Evans (33)
Elizabeth Hurley (41)
Tony Ward (43)
Gina Gershon (44)
Kim Deal (45)

Friday, June 09, 2006

Christina Aguilera Quote of the Day!

" I give money to a company who makes hearing aids. More people should hear me sing."

[Thx Albz]

Haylie Duff Who?

I know I'm so over Parasite Hilton! But here's a kind of funny radio interview she had with Jackie and Bender in Seattle. At one point during the interview they ask her about that whole rivalry she had with Haylie Duff over the song Screwed. Paris answers "Who's that?" Dumb whore, she knows who that horse face is! Paris really thinks she's making important music and is doing something with her life. She also think she's a good role model to young girls. Yeah, young girls that wanna be hookers when they grow up.

Listen to this shit!

[Thx Caitlin]

Is Linda Evangelista Knocked Up?

Linda Evangelista is my favorite model of all time. Bitch is true perfection, but she needed to rethink this ensemble. I don't think she's fat, but she's working the chunk in this gold wreck at the 160th Anniversary of Loewe.

Hot Slut of the Month: Harvey

Harvey scored almost 50% of your votes to become Dlisted's Hot Slut of May! Jordan's own is very proud and will see you in the finals next year! Maya Rudolph was his closest competitor with only 19%. Thanks to all who voted!

O Jessica!

Why?! Why?! Why?!

Jessica Lange at last night's 17th Annual Human Rights Watch International Film Festival.

Again...Why?! Why?! Why?!

Afternoon Crumbs

Someone needs to hit this bitch with their car [TMZ]

Ann Curry has hot moves [Gawker]

Weird Al is back [BWE]

Ashton Kutcher's nasty-ass beard [Cityrag]

Who is Katherine Heigl and why do we care about her sex tape? [Egotastic!]

Brittany Murphy has a stupid wink [Hollywood Tuna]

Asshole Simpson's new music video [Just Jared]

The Aniston loves to cry [IDLYITW]

Halle's man is so fucking fine he makes me wanna commit a crime [Popsugar]

Mimi hates to be wet [Hollywood Rag]

I know he's not hittin' all those hos [Drunken Stepfather]

Is This a Lady Dude?

Young Hilary Duff is turning into a straight-up MAN! What happened to her?! She used to be semi-cute, I don't understand. Did she get cheek implants or just severely skinny in the face? Hilary is seen here at an Ocean Magazine event celebrating trannies New York City. At least Hilary can always count on Haylie to be the fugly one.

The 13 Memorably Unpopular Characters from Popular TV

The A.V. Club has named some of the most unpopular characters from TV. I pretty much agree with their choices, but Scrappy Doo as #1?! I loved me some Scrappy...I loved him more than Scooby! Probably cause I could relate to him. The rest of the list includes Cousin Oliver from The Brady Bunch, Dawn from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Steve Urkel from Family Matters and so on and so forth. Click here to see the rest of the list!

[Thx Stacy]

Is Nicole Richie Hittin' Paris' Leftovers?

Socialslut, Paris Hilton, dated pro-skateboarder Chad Muska in 2004. I'm not sure how long they "dated" but no doubt she got freaky with him. Probably two seconds are meeting him. Well, Chad was seen out with Nicole Richie recently. I hope they are just friends. If Nicole hits that, she's no doubt going to walk away with a wart-ridden cooch. Seriously, I wouldn't even shake hands with any piece that Paris hit...although I probably have because ho has slept with everyone!


Tom Wants Angelina

Upon hearing the news that Angelina Jolie gave birth to Shiloh Nouvel, Tom Cruise immediately placed a call to Africa to congratulate Brad Pitt and Angie on their new baby. Apparently, during their conversation he invited Angie and Brad to visit the Scientology center in Beverly Hills once they settle into their Malibu pad.

A source said: "Even though they've know tom for years, Cruise was the last person Brad and Angelina expected a call from," "Tom's got babies on the brain. He's still euphoric over the birth of his new girl Suri. He got so caught up in the excitement ... he made the call,"

Tom tried seducing Angie more by offering her an Award by the Scientology Center to honor all her charity work. Angie apparently turned it down.

This is one of those "yeah right" stories, but I could see it happening. Tom is nuts enough to completely think that Angelina would be remotely interested in his crazy ways!

[Post Chronicle]

James Woods' Trophy

James Woods' has a new piece and she's 20-years-old! She's not even of legal drinking age! The 59-year-old actor showed off his new trophy at the Entourage season premiere party in Los Angeles.

Poor girl is probably just off the bus and thinks that James is going to make her a huge star. The only film making she's going to be making is the one that involves a tripod and a mouthful of saggy dong!


Demure, Mysterious & Sexy

It's Bai Ling all cleaned up and looking like a lady at the 2nd Annual Turks and Caicos Film Festival on Wednesday night. She looks positively radiant and gorgeous. The wig even looks half real! This is why I love Bai, she can clean up or she can trash it up...she's versatile like that or maybe her medication finally kicked in.

Shiloh is Mute

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie appeared on Namibian TV to talk about something that isn't talked about enough, the birth of the Messiah. During the interview, Angie talked the most while Brad stayed silent. He knows his place. When Angie finally let him talk, he said:

"They have been so gracious to us and made our stay here very special and because of that we have had an incredible time with our family, exploring the country. And we had truly peaceful birth of our daughter. And for that we are eternally grateful, and we will certainly be back."

The pair are said to be coming back to the States this weekend. Their Los Angeles home has been buzzing with activity in preparation for the Royal family's return to us peons.

Please watch the video, because Angie won't shut her trout lips!

Watch it!


Celebs Love Free Diamonds!

Last night's Celebrate Love event at the Cartier Mansion in NYC drew tons of celebrities looking to wear borrowed Cartier. Janet Jackson showed off her new body yet again, but she still has those sick Ramen curls and her face is a wittle busted. Veiny foreheads are the work of the devil. Where was her troll?

Ashley Judd and Salma Hayek are both equally hot. Seriously, Salma's chee-chees are much more appealing than Scarlett Johansson's.

David Bowie went dark and long!

Chloe Sevigny is wearing the hottest dress of the evening, but still looks like an Eastern European tranny hooker!

Ok, Scarlett is hot....I get it!

Oh My Little Pony! What would I do without you? Note to MLP: The severe bun makes you look even more like you need a saddle and some sugar cubes! It ain't cute, but love the borrowed necklace!

Michael K on MySpace

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