Dlisted: Flavor of Love 2: The Bitch Doesn't Fall Far From the Tree

Monday, October 02, 2006

Flavor of Love 2: The Bitch Doesn't Fall Far From the Tree

It wouldn't be the opening of a Flavor of Love episode with a fight. This time the final 3 find that their parents will be visiting the mansion. All hell breaks loose when Delishis refuses to vacate the room for New York's family. Instead of handling these like adults, these two start fight like two chickens at a Mexican cock fight with emphasis on cock.

Enough with the rollers. Get a curling iron damn.

Continue reading "The Bitch Doesn't Fall Far From the Tree"

Thanks for listening Delishis. Delishis was about to fuck New York with that curling iron and you know homegirl is kinky and likes it to be turned ON. She also would like Delishis to open it while it's inside her. Damn, I'm skank.

There they go...blah blah blah... I'm so sick of the fighting seriously. These editors need to keep us guessing and give us something new, like kissing. I know in my heart of hearts that these two trannies lip lock.

Finally, the fight cools down and Delishis continued to clean the room with New York saying:

"I'm over her. I'm her master. I'll give her a lashing and she'll come right back."

There's something racist in that and I can't figure it out. The heart wants us to love!

Mr. and Mrs. Delishis were first at the door. How much do I love Mrs. Delishis? She's like a ghetto Marge Simpson. Seriously, she looks younger and hotter than Delishis.

Second up was Krazy's granny and her daddy who is wearing a sombrero and has quite the growl on his face.

Just joshing, Krazy's granny (above) and her mother showed up. The father was probably too ashamed to show his face on this trash.

I didn't know Krazy's mother was Cheryl Tiegs?

And of course....the devil woman herself...Mrs. New York. Bitch is crazier and nuttier than her daughter. She's also manlier with a beater wig. That statue's wig in the back looks more natural than this phony haired scorpion woman.

She instantly tells Foofy Foofy that she doesn't want her daughter anywhere near him.

And cue to New York! She immediately looks like a cross between pained and dumbfounded. In order to achieve this look she probably thinks back to her operation.

Just kidding, you know she's a pre-op.

Mrs. New York finally goes in for the kill and pushes Foofy and where does that land her?

Outside! That's right bitch, nobody messes with Foofy in his rented by Vh1 mansion.

It wouldn't be a show without this crazy bat, so they let her back in the house. She takes her daughter aside and the two have a father/son chat. New York tells her mom how much she's "in love with this man!"

She also tells her that Foofy says words that she's never heard before and her mother basically makes gorilla noises after that. Um...this is getting worse and worse.

Do you think their wigs came from the same pubic bush?

Mrs. New York finally decides to make peace with Foofy and offers him a hug and an apology. This bitch is a hired actress, right?

Um, that clock isn't telling the right time. Don't know one have some AAs?

And cue New York! I am so sick of this fake bitch. She needs to go back to acting class, cause her shit is stank up in that department.

Foofy then announces to everyone that his 10,000 childrens by 450 baby mamas will join them.

This is freaky it's like Children of the Corn, but this version will be called Children out of Wedlock.

One of his daughter's is fucking named, Designer?!!!! Why the hell would you do that to a poor girl, because you know they call her Designer Imposter at school.

One of Foofy's daughter's asks Krazy if she went to college and she responds:

"I want to go to college at Southwestern and I want to study um.....um...what's it called"

You need to go to college and study LYING, you fake ass bitch! Krazy earns her title as Queen Fake Ass Bitch of that house.

Delishis tells his daughters that she's just trying to do her and not pursue an acting or singing career.

Quick get some RAID, a giant roach is trying to attack this bitch's face!

New York puts on her phoney act yet again and brushes the tears from her pancake make-up encrusted eye. Um...you are gonna need more than a little napkin to wipe a tear off that mask. You're gonna need some Windex, WD-40 and rat poison.

His daughters figure this ho out when they asked, "Gimme some things you guys have in common."

I can give you one! A DICK! That's for real.

New York let it all out in confessional when she said:

"Those little bastards - Oooh, that's bad, I shouldn't have said that!"

OMG! Ok, now that was good.

Mrs. New York takes her son aside and tells her that she's dying of a mysterious illness that the doctors don't know. I know what it's called, it's called BAD ACTING bitch!

Of course, it turns out to be fake and New York catches on. Mrs. New York is just trying to keep her son away from Foofy. Hey, I can't blame her.

Later, Foofy's daughter tells him that she thinks Krazy is a fake ass bitch. Let's just call her FAB from now. For real.

After, Foofy's family leave...FAB and her family got down to the liquor cabinet and fucked themselves up.

I love Mr. New York. He's such a fucking pushover though. He joined the white women for a drunken dance fest and seemed be enjoying himself since his devil wife wasn't around.

Spoke to soon. That's the fucking Grudge right there and you don't mess with that voodoo shit.

Mrs. New York immediately comes down and gets into it with Krazy, because she wants them to shut up. Blah Blah, more fighting, blah blah blah.

Those pants Mrs. New York's wearing I've seen in a stripper store. Not even joking.

Foofy takes Delishis and her family to the Magic Castle in Hollywood to enjoy a magic show. Delishis gets her head cut off, when she really should've gotten her dick cut off. AHAHAH!

I love Mrs. Delishis. She's a peaceful woman.

The two witches confront Krazy, because of the way she spoke to Mrs. New York.

Stirring up my witch's brew, I got magic, ala kazalaa ka zoom!

Why is Krazy in the pool in her dress?

Seriously, she just fucked up like a $15 dress right there. What is she thinking?

When Foofy got back from his date with Delishis and family, Krazy played her fucked up demo tape for him. It sounded like two cats trying to fuck, but realizing that a crazed bear was after them.

Hmm...and he wonders why his career is in the toilet?

Krazy's granny and mother learn that on their date, they are all getting corn rows!

Her granny was excited, because she thought corn rows was some kind of sweet corn.

Gangsta! She's ready to turn tricks now.

Ok, this isn't right. Look at the desperation in her eyes. Krazy's mom realized at this moment what was really going on and she suddenly felt sad. I do too.

On New York's family date, her mother ate this:

That ho is frontin. I've seen her fat fucking thighs. That's what she eats while she's taking a dump.

Foofy tells Mrs. New York how much he cares for her daughter and how he wishes she would see the real him. Blah, boring, blah, boring.

Oooh, blue cap!

Is that a pink dildo, I see?

That bitch is ugly. Flip Wilson anyone?

Anyway, she tells us that New York is coming back with her no matter what. Bitch, shut up and suck your own cock.

AND HELL NO! New York had to go there and say something rude about Mrs. Delishis. This woman has hurt nobody! She is a beautiful person with a heart of gold! New York had the fucking nerve to say that this woman's hair was plastic.

Oh plastic like your vagina?! Yeah I know your secret. You carry around a plastic vagina in your pocket and when a man goes to stick it in, you quickly put it over your dick. Don't try and snow me!

To her mother's disdain, New York doesn't get eliminated.

But that fake ass bitch, Krazy finally goes home. Don't worry, you can probably catch her at your local strip club very soon. She'll be the stripper that really thinks she can sing and just to appease her, the owner will let her sing her own song while she claps that ass.

Mrs. New York thinks that Foofy is trying to destroy her. Jesus, the melodrama of it all.

She decides to yet again give in and hugs Foofy. Her fake ass weave gets stuck and she loses it.

Vh1?! Couldn't you have gotten a better actress?! Was Telma Hopkins not available? That bitch can act! Have you seen her artistry at work in Gimme a Break?

Mrs. New York leaves the mansion only to return to bring her daughter back to her. Oh, what a cliffhanger! Let me guess, they are going to fight some more and push and call Krazy a fake ass bitch.


I'll be tuning in though!


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