Dlisted: 11/20/2005 - 11/27/2005

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Attack of the Clones!

[Thanks to Kim and Gina]

HoHan Will Never be 1/10th of This Bitch!


Brangelina in Pakistan!

Brad Pitt and Angie Jolie are visiting a devastated Pakistan and met with the President. What are they talking about and why are they sitting so far apart. It's so awkward!

That lady better watch out or Angie's totally going to take her baby! Not without my daughter!

Sorry Miss Jackson, You Still Look Nasty

Janet Jackson is getting her exercise on to trying and get her body back together. She's probably getting ready to launch a new album or something. She always packs on the twinkies when she's on down time and then gets a couple of ribs removed when she's ready to hit the public eye again. She also got some new braids which make her look nastier. I love this bitch, but she needs to get it together!

Things could be worse, she could be Jacko.

[Hollywood Rag]

Courtney Cox has a Gross Spine


Who is Mikey Post?

Mikey Post is a Los Angeles actor/performer who happens to be a little person. He's also a fucking man about town. He seriously parties with all these celebs and shit. On his website he has a gallery devoted to pics of him with Parasite Hilton. You know he hit that.

He's totally hot and I'd totally jump on that.

Check out his website.

[Thanks to Lisa]

A Thanksgiving Without You!

Chestica Simpson made her way to Texas to celebrate Thanksgiving with her family after it was announced that her marriage is officially kaput. Nick stayed in L.A. with his bitches and watched sports and shit. Yeah right, you know he went out on got himself some!

Both are denying that a third party is involved and blame the separation on always being apart. Please, that's such a bullshit. I hate when celebrities play that card. That sounds like a marriage made in heaven! A man that you never have to see and when you do it's only for a little sex and then you're gone again. Shit, that's perfection.

You know the real reason behind the split is Chestica's vagina couldn't keep quiet anymore! It's her time!

[The National Ledger]

Fishsticks and an Apple

Apple is pretty adorable. A knocked up Fishsticks is note cute!


These constant steroid checks have gotten ridiculous. - Cindy C

[Thanks to Jaq G]

Hot Slut of the Day!

Swoosie Kurtz

Birthday Sluts

Peter Facinelli (32)
Tina Turner (66)
Robert Goulet (72)

Friday, November 25, 2005

Death Don't Take Me!

TomKat Does Shanghai!

TomKat and their alien fetus are currently in China shooting Mission Impossible 3. Poor Katie looks like a wreck. She seriously doesn't look glowing, she looks nasty. Tom looks creepier than ever.

"So remember, when we get home I'm going to give you a sonogram." - Tom

"Yes, King Alien." - Katie

"Quick hold my hand, there's cameras!" - Tom

Mimi Gets in the Spirit!

Mimi proved that she's still a 16yo girl stuck in a 35yo body. This is so 13 Going on 30. She performed at a NFL halftime looking like a fucking mess. Did she make her assistants remove the size 12 tags from her outfits? Her Swarvoski crystal mic is seriously hot shit.

[Hollywood Rag]

Madge Hates Vicodin

After falling off of a horse and breaking several bones, Madge was put on the pain killer Vicodin. She insists that she hated the way it made her feel.

"I only tried Vicodin once I was in a lot of pain, and everyone kept telling me to try it, but they kept saying, 'Be careful It's so amazing."

"You're going to get addicted' So I called five people to get advice before I took it, and they all told me I was going to love it. I just chewed the entire inside of my mouth I bitched at everybody And I was in more pain It was the worst experience of my life"

Taking Vicodin was the worst experience in her life? And why is she blaming a pill on bitching people out. Doesn't she do that anyway? I don't care what she says, Vicodin is some hot shit!

[Rolling Stone]

Mischa Barton Engaged?

Cisco Adler has proposed to Mischa Barton in Hawaii. Gross! Cisco was once engaged to that nasty-ass Kimbo Stewart. Who the fuck would date anyone that was engaged to that hag? Mischa has apparently accepted this offer.

Seriously, I hope he has good dick. Because he is ugly in the face and she has more money than him. It can't be love, because we know that love IS NOT blind. That bitch has to be mentally retarded, seriously. She doesn't know what she's doing.

[Female First]

Mr. Miyagi is Dead!

This is sad! Wax on...wax off!

[Bangkok Post] [Thanks to everyone who sent this to me!]

British Sluts are the Best!

The British has the best fucking celebrities ever! Seriously if you're blonde, have big tits and are a major slut..you will be a huge star in the UK. Orlaith McAllister made it big on Big Brother UK. She was known for being a drunk slut. And here she doesn't let us down. Look at the fucking last picture. Her cellulite is such a turn-on!

[Yeeeah!] [Thanks to Joanne]


Rock out with your cock out!!! - yazie

Hot Slut of the Day!

Dr. Sally Ride

Birthday Sluts

Dougray Scott (40)
Barbara & Jenna Bush (24)
Christina Applegate (34)
Nena Cherry (36)
Jil Hennessey (37)
Amy Grant (45)
John Larroquette (58)
Ricardo Montalban (85)

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Days Of Our Lives Turns 40!

by Lahoma00

Days Of Our Lives is one of the hottest soap operas ever. It's so fucking ridiculous! At times this shit has made Passions look like a David Mamet play!

Days has so many good characters. Some of my favorites include:

Porn star Crystal Galore
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Buck toothed, Elvis obsessed Susan Banks
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Pissed off high schooler Susan aka GIGANTOR
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and April Ramirez. April was so fucking hot, especially when she was drunk. Look at this slut!
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Days is celebrating it's 40th birthday this month. In honor of this event, I present the top 5 hottest/piece of shit Days stories ever!

5. Vivian Buries Carly Alive

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Vivian was one twisted bitch. She was pissed off with Carly so she decided to kill herself and frame Carly. She even threw herself off a balcony! Then she got bored and buried Carly alive! After she did it, she rolled around on the grave like she was having a fucking orgasm and talked to Carly on a walkie-talkie. Remember when Vivian stole Victor and Kate's fertilized egg and implanted it in herself?

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Here's where Vivian almost got a lobotomy!

4. Swamp Girl

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Bo got lost in the Bayou and almost fell in love with this mud covered bitch. Turns out she was really Princess Greta!

3. Sami as Stan or Garden of Eden (tie)

This was a fucking hard one. It was pretty hot when uber bitch Sami (yes a woman) went around for a few months disguised as Stan (played by that fag from Boy Meets Boy). Sami/Stan even went over to Iraq to help the troops!

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However, the Garden of Eden story was also good: Princess Greta (aka Swamp Girl) and Austin have to go to the virtual Garden of Eden, where they must fight Satan and Sami dressed as a witch! All in loincloths!

I'm not making any of this shit up!

2. Marlena is a Serial Killer

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A lot of people didn't like this story, but I thought it was pretty hot. Basically, one day Marlena woke up and decided to become a serial killer! She killed half the fucking town, including old Alice Horton, whom she choked with a donut!
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But then we found out that Marlena had been brainwashed into becoming a serial killer, and that all her victims were really alive and living on some fucking island that looked just like Salem. Still, this storyline was really hot because it featured a travelling circus, a runaway tiger, Tony pretending he was a ninja, Marlena falling off a building only to land on top of Sami AND Deidre Hall vomiting!

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1. Marlena is Possessed by the Devil

Image hosted by TinyPic.com

You bitches knew this was coming. Marlena gets possessed by the devil, burns churches down, levitates and turns into a demon. Enough said!

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The show keeps getting better. Last week the Virgin Mary visited Mimi and told her that she wasn't going to hell for getting an abortion!

Fuck LOST, this show is brilliant!

Happy Birthday Days!!

Michael K on MySpace

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