Dlisted: 08/14/2005 - 08/21/2005

Saturday, August 20, 2005

Attack of the Clones!

Guess the Celebrity?



UPDATE - Click here to see the owner of this smile!

Played Out

So he cheated on her ass, then she apparently took him back and now she's dumped his ass again! Sienna Miller has tried and tried to forgive and forget, but she cannot. Sienna was photographed leaving a lunch with Jude in tears. And so she's cut her losses and moved on... apparently. This isn't the end of it, trust me.

A source said: "They have tried to make a go of it, but it comes down to the fact that Sienna can't trust Jude. She really thought their relationship was something special and was completely in love with Jude."

"But Sienna can't forgive Jude's betrayal.
"Jude has pretty much given up. If Sienna can't forgive him after all he has done to say sorry, then there really isn't anything more he can do."

Jesus! They are just doing this for publicity now. Next week they will be married!

[Contact Music]

Own a piece of gay history!



Star Jones and Al Reynolds are selling their Manhattan penthouse at an asking price of $2.25 million. Click here to see their scrumptious abode. I see Al's decorating touches everywhere! However, I'm sad that they didn't include pictures of Al's leather dungeon!

[Corcoran]

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!



Producers are furious that photos from the upcoming movie Brokeback Mountain showing nude love scenes between actors Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal have been leaked to the media. - Pandemonium

What the hell kind of GD outfit is that?

Tara Reid's in London, so you Brits better get all your vaccines! Here she is leaving Kabaret night club looking like a hooker from the 70s! Trashing Tara Reid is like drinking a fine wine!

Stay away from the Paris!

Hayden Panettiere turns 16 tomorrow and the stupid bitch is already smoking in public and going to clubs with Paris Hilton. You may know Hayden from such films as Remembers the Titans and Raising Helen. In the past few days the two have been seen shopping and slutting it up around town. I think they met at The Teen Choice Awards. First of all if Hayden's parents gave a shit about their daughter they would immediately keep her away from the Paris. Unless, they want her to be the next Tara Reid. It's not like all of us didn't do that shit when we were 15, but Paris Hilton is a whole other breed of skank!







[JJB]

We make a beautiful pair!

Angelina Jolie and her new kid, Zahara both look absolutely gorgeous on the NYC set of Angie's new flick The Good Shepard starring Matt Damon.


click on pic for a larger version

[JJB]

Hot Slut of the Day!



Chuck Norris

[For Liz]


Birthday Sluts



James Marsters (43)
Fred Durst (35)
Joan Allen (49)
Robert Plan (57)
Connie Chung (59)
Isaac Hayes (63)

Friday, August 19, 2005

The Tom Sizemore sex tape has arrived!


Love the bracelet Tom...

Finally the Tom Sizemore sex tape has arrived. Heidi Fleiss is nowhere to be seen thank god. Anyhow, it's not available now. But some smutty internet site has purchased it.

You know oddly enough I don't give a fig if I see this shit or not.

Who am I kidding?! Bring it on!

[AVN]

Another one bites the dust!

Jenny Mcarthy has filed for divorce from her husband John Asher. I always thought he was a fag anyway. They were married for six years.

And the reason? Take a lovely guess..

"irreconcilable differences"

Of course!

Can't they fucking give real reasons. Like: the bitch is gay!

[Yahoo]

Tanya Turner is a hot bitch!

Tanya Turner is the main character in the British series Footballers Wives. This bitch is so hot! She is too high class to make hot slut of the day! Michael K and I love her ass....she's the fictional Posh Spice. Everyone watch Footballers Wives...all this bitch does is smoke cigarettes, get her nails done, and act like a slut!

Image hosted by TinyPic.com

Marcia Cross engaged.......to a dude!

My favorite Desperate Housewife, Marcia Cross is engaged to boyfriend Tom Mahoney. That bitch is some kind of stockbroker. The bitch is happy and they haven't set a date.

In related news, Teri Snatcher has just ran over a stockbroker in Los Angeles. Details to come.

[CNN]

The "Duh" heard around the world!



Courtney Love admitted in court today that she's not off drugs. DUH! Stupid bitch.

She's been sent back to rehab for like the 2,347,890th time!

[AP]

Mariah Scarey don't wanna be no BBW!

Blogger Andrea Harner is reporting that Mariah Scarey's assistants perform a daily function to remove her size 10 or 12 tags with size 6 tags on all her clothes! This is amazing! And totally true, because I've heard first hand!

A personal source of mine tells me that for a magazine shoot Mariah Scarey's people insisted that Mariah was a size 6. But when Mariah got there she couldn't fucking fit into anything, because that fat bitch is no size 6! So, the stylists had to take these super expensive designer duds and cut them in half! I swear! Once they cut the clothes in half, they put them on her and used rope and twine to tighten them in the back!

Why doesn't this bitch just embrace her BBWness! And go with it! Shit, isn't big beautiful?

[Andrea Harner]

Natasha Lyonne is totally freaking out!

Natasha Lyonne has been missing for a while, did you miss her? Me neither. Anyhow, The Post apparently has found her. They say she's lying in Beth Israel Hospital in NYC suffering from drug withdrawal and disease. They say the disease is Hep c.

I hate to see this kind of thing happen, but we all must learn from Courtney Love. Play with heroin and you're gonna get roasted!

[Gawker]

The Unsexiest Man in the World!

UK Magazine, Company has voted Peter Andre as the Unsexiest Man in the Universe and I have to agree. Jordan's main hubby just reeks of sleaziness!



Also in the list were Michael Jackson, Johnny Vegas and Pete Doherty?

Where was Tara Reid in that list?

[Ananova]

Guess the Celebrity?

Goldie is freaky deaky!

Goldie Hawn and her lover Kurt Russell recently set off their alarm after getting freaky in their bedroom.

She explained: "We went upstairs and we were in the bedroom and it was dark, and that was it.

"We just had the most beautiful lovemaking experience.".

But their hot sexy was interrupted by the coppers! Damn, talk about a buzz kill.

These two are probably into some tantric shit. They were probably reenacting a scene from their film Overboard. Goldie played herself and Kurt played the boat! She rode that thing until he threw her off!

[Female First]

I don't think this was any kind of accident!

On Tuesday, that proper English lady Madonna fell off a horse and broke a bunch of bones. Her spokeswhore said that it was a new horse and Madge wasn't used to it. It seems now that the new horse was a gift from Madge's hubby Guy Ritchie. Hmm...now I know what really happened.

There is some Dial M for Murder shit going on here. Guy has had it with that dumb bitch so paid this horse off to pull a Christopher Reeve on her ass. But since Madge's bones are practically made out of steel, nothing terrible happened.

Oh well Guy, you're stuck with her for another zillion years!

[Female First]

You bitches called it!

When I reported that Eminem cancelled his European tour due to "exhaustion" many of you commented that meant the bitch was detoxing. And you were right. Eminem has checked his stupid ass into rehab. Why? Because that bitch is addicted to sleeping pills. What a girly addiction! He's like the modern day Neely O'Hara!

His record company Interscope confirmed: "Eminem is in the hospital under doctors' care. He is being treated for dependency on sleep medication.".

Neely, I mean Eminem is currently in some Michigan rehab clinic getting fucked with a toilet plunger as we speak! And trust me that kind of shit doesn't only happen in prison!

[Female First]

I Dream of Alba?

Is Jessica Alba set to play Jeannie in a big-screen remake of I Dream of Jeannie? Reports are that Jessica will not do a sequel to The Fantastic Four, because that bitch is too good for that shit. Apparently she's heading for leading lady opposite Jimmy Fallon in the Jeannie remake.

Jessica learn from Nicole Kidman and don't do TV remakes! It is practically career suicide! Stick with The Fantastic Four and stick with keeping your clothes off!

[Page Six]

Lesley Ann Bitch

Lesley Ann Warren was fired on the second day of filming on the low-budget, indie-feature Devil You Know, because she's a demanding bitch! Here are the reasons:

  • Lesley is staying at the St. Regis hotel here in NYC while filming, but she also requested a room at The Ritz Carlton downtown so she has a place to rest in between scenes. Her dressing room was not good enough.
  • She has been awful and nasty to her younger co-star Rosamund Pike.
  • She threw a fit when water was given to her on ice. She demanded room-temp water. She was also pissed that they didn't give her any scented candles.
  • Lesley had an assistant director fired, because she didn't like the tone of his voice.
So the director canned her ass and she was replaced by Lena Olin.

Lesley, don't act like that shit! You're walking on thin ice as it is. You need every role you can get!

[Page Six]

The Dlisted Report

Al Pacino has signed on for the remake of the French classic Rififi. The original film was directed by Jules Dassin and revolved around a career thief who, upon leaving prison, discovers his wife has left him. He returns to crime, plotting a daring jewelry store heist. [Variety]

Daniel Craig will join Nicole Kidman on the remake of Invasion of the Body Snatchers simply called Invasion. Produced by Joel Silver, the sci-fi thriller tells the story of a mysterious epidemic that alters the behavior of human beings. When a Washington D.C. psychiatrist (Kidman) discovers the epidemic's origins are extraterrestrial, she must fight to protect her son, who may hold the key to stopping an imminent invasion. [The Hollywood Reporter]

Kelly Monaco and John O'Hurley will rematch for Dancing with the Stars on September 20th for a special 90-minute show. Viewers will decide again and the winner will be announced September 22nd. [Cynthia's Cynopsis]

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!!



After much consideration, Haylie and Hilary decided that it would be essential to immortalize themselves before someone assassinated their annoying sorry asses. When asked about her opinion on the outcome of this portrait, Hilary stated "I really love the way the artist portrayed my teeth...like, the painting totally captures them as their actual size." - Dominique


R.I.P. Kaysar from Big Brother - AGAIN!!!



Kaysar's Bio

Hot Slut of the Day!



Susan Anton

Birthday Sluts



John Stamos (42)
Lil' Romeo (16)
Erika Christensen (23)
Fat Joe (35)
Matthew Perry (36)
Kyra Sedgwick (40)
Bill Clinton (59)

Thursday, August 18, 2005

Bareback Mountain

Here's some screencaps up the upcoming cowboy love story Brokeback Mountain starring Jake G and Heath L. Who is the top and who is the bottom? Oh and in the last pic are they crying or jerking it?







Up on the roof!

Jared Leto threw a BBQ at his Los Angeles home. His new chick Ashley Olsen was there as well as her hooker sister, MK Olsen. Jared got wet and got on the roof, to do..I don't know what. But damn he's hot!





[JJB]

I've never tried cocaine in my life!

In this pic she looks like a crack head...



But in this one she looks stoned! So which is it?! Richie looks gorgeous!



[JJB]

America's Next Piece of Trash!

It's that time again for America's Next Top Model. The new site launched today with all the new bitches. This bitch is my fave:

I don't think she's that hot, but she's a Dairy Queen Manager and I love my blizzards!



Check em out

Kanye loves the gays more than his ego!

Kanye West is giving a shout out to all us gays and wants to end gay bashing in hip hop! No gay bashing in hip hop?! Fuck that!

Kanye says that when he was lil' people would call his ass mama's boy and this made me pretty self-conscious. He said: "And what happened was, it made me kind of homophobic, 'cause it's like I would go back and question myself,"

Kanye changed his gay bashing ways when he found out his cousin was a friend of Dorothy's. "It was kind of like a turning point when I was like, `Yo, this is my cousin. I love him and I've been discriminating against gays.'"

Kanye says hip-hop was always about "speaking your mind and about breaking down barriers, but everyone in hip-hop discriminates against gay people." He adds that in slang, gay is "the opposite, the exact opposite word of hip-hop."

Kanye's message: "Not just hip-hop, but America just discriminates. And I wanna just, to come on TV and just tell my rappers, just tell my friends, `Yo, stop it.'"

I say just shut up and come out of the closet already Kanye!

[Yahoo]


The Top 20 Most Overrated Movies of All-Time

According to Premiere Magazine - Do we agree?

2001: A Space Odyssey
A Beautiful Mind
American Beauty
An American in Paris
Chariots of Fire
Chicago
Clerks
Easy Rider
Fantasia
Field of Dreams
Forrest Gump
Gone with the Wind
Good Will Hunting
Jules & Jim
Moonstruck
Monster's Ball
Mystic River
Nashville
The Red Shoes
The Wizard of Oz

[Premiere]

Body by Jake

I know how lots of you sluts love getting your Jake on...so here ya go..













[JJB]

BREAKING NEWS!!

Hohan bought a pizza!



But I think it was for her new bff, Rumer Willis... Oh well!



[JJB]

At least the rug matches the drapes...

Who would hit Carrot Top?


click on pic to see his pubes!

[Oh No They Didn't]

Hmm...smells like crack infused fish...

Must be Hohan!



[Oh No They Didn't]



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