Dlisted: 08/07/2005 - 08/14/2005

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Paula is an innocent woman!



Paula Abdul will not be fired from American Idol after Fox's probe into the allegations that former contestant Corey Clark probed Paula came up inconclusive. I love that word, probe. Probe is better than fuck, I think. "Yeah he probed me last night"...anyway, back on track!

However, a new policy will be in place next season. An "enhanced non-fraternization policy" will be in place to prevent this shit happening again.

Paula said: "I'm grateful this ordeal is over, and I'm so looking forward to getting back to the job I love," Abdul said in a statement issued after Friday's announcement by Fox. "Once again, I thank my fans from throughout the world for their undying love and support."
What fans? She has like two. Corey Clark and Scat Cat!

[Yahoo]

My girls wants to party all the time..party all the time..

Here's Tara Reid in St. Tropez doing what she does best. Guzzle down booze! If you're going to get into the pool, take off your damned mascara! Did anybody catch Wild on Tara? It's in my Tivo so today will be spent laughing at Tara all day! Actually, I care for her and wish she would find love. And not love in a bottle!







[Oh No They Didn't]

The Photoshop Awards: Mariah in Allure Magazine





[Oh No They Didn't]

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!



Family pictures show a marked tension in the family dynamic in the years preceding the Menendez murders. - Kara

Hot Slut of the Day!



Jan Crouch

Visit Jan's Website

Birthday Sluts



Danny Bonaduce (46)
John Slattery (42)
Herb Ritts (53)
Alma Cuervo (54)
Don Ho (75)

Friday, August 12, 2005

Courtney welcomes you to the weekend!

"Drugs, me...oh of course not Judge!"



His name is Jesus!



Jesus has shown his face yet again. That Jesus has been everywhere! A ham sandwhich, a plastic bag and now a perogi! Donna Lee from Point Place, Michigan was preparing this Polish pastry when she noticed that one had the face of Jesus on it! Oh Brother! She's a quack that Donna!

She quacked: "The last one I flipped over was Jesus, so I flipped the spatula, and my husband goes: "What? There's Jesus!" and he goes: "Oh my God!""

That's not very polite! It's Jesus not God!

So what do you do when you have the face of Jesus on a pastry? You eat it! No, you put it on eBay ! Just like everybody else. Is there a stamp out there that all these loons are using to put the face of Jesus on everything! At the time I'm writing this, the auction has reached $1,050!

These bitches are C-R-A-Z-Y! Who is going to shell out that kind of dough for well, dough!

[eBay]

I thought I had skinny legs!

Here's Teri Snatcher enjoying a run. She better watch out or those twig legs are going to crumble! At least she's not fat like that whore, Eva LonWHORIA. Oooh I know that's going to set some of you off! Just kidding, Eva's not fat just thick! Just kidding Eva's hot!



[JJB]

Tom Sizemore wants your sex!

Doctors have diagnosed Tom Sizemore with a disease called priapism. The disease makes you hungry for sex like all the time! Like Insatiable for it! Thirsty, hungry, needing it, get my drift?

Tom's manager said: "He can have sex nine times without stopping. His condition explains his sexual addiction. He's in the midst of a massive depression, but he's making tremendous progress."
Damn, 9 times? You'd think he would have half of Hollywood knocking down his door. No wonder he fucked Heidi Fleiss. She's such a slut that she could take it a dozen times!

[IMDB]

What the hell kind of GD outfit is this?!?

Bitch looked better wearing those pissy pants! You couldn't pay me enough money to wear that shit. Ok, actually you could. That's like Memoirs of a Downtown Julie Brown.

It's the Gere!

Damn bring back the silver hair! This is for a film he's shooting in NYC. But still, that shit don't look right. And Richard please have a tulip lift, ASAP!



[Lime-Light]

Maddox and Bitches in NYC!

Maddox leads his bitches out of a store. And by the way, what is that fat lady holding over there? Let's say it's a picture of Aniston.

Scarlett tells Woody how it goes!

Bitch, I told you not to take a picture of your chunky jizz all over my face. It's all over Dlisted!

Why is Paris always looking at her tatas?

Is she looking for her dignity in there?

Guess the Celebrity?

Oh that Mariah!

She never ceases to amaze me! She always says the most fucked up things.

Here's the latest about her marriage to Tommy Mottola:

"I longed for someone to come kidnap me back then. I used to fantasize about that a lot. I'd have my pocketbook with me at all times in case I had to make an escape."

Bitch, you did not have your purse with you! Come on! You had a lot of money, couldn't you just get your fat ass up and walk out? Bitch this whining is getting old!

[Ananova]

Thandie's still pissed!

Thandie Newton has slammed director John Duigan because he seduced her ass when she was 16 and he was 41. John and Thandie met when she starred in his film Flirting and a dangerous relationship began.

Thandie said: "I was hooked like a fish, trying to swim away and being tugged back. I think the film business is a really dangerous place for young people. It's about exploitation. "I'm not angry with him anymore. That person means absolutely nothing to me now and I would go to great lengths to avoid him. I just feel very fortunate that I've come through all that."

I can understand that ain't right for a 41yo to go after a kid. But at the same time bitch wanted some lovin'. Shit, I did worse shit when I was 16 and I don't blame anyone and hardly think I was a victim. Sure those men were nasty, but I got mines in the end. In the form of gonorrhea but still! And so did Thandie, she has an amazing film career...I mean she amazing skin..yeah that's the one!

[Contact Music]

Pot Calling Kettle

Kimberly Stewart has reportedly sent Jennifer Aniston some stupid flowers apologizing for calling the bitch "homely" in a magazine interview. Jennifer was apparently distraught after reading an interview with Kimbo in Blender Magazine.

Kimbo told Blender: "I like her because she's homely. She obviously has to have something else - it's not like she's gorgeous or anything.".

Jennifer told Vanity Fair: "It literally ruined my night. I got my feelings very hurt actually.".

Kimbo responded with: "It was one of those things you say and then you bite your tongue and think what did I just do. She said that thing in Vanity Fair and it made me feel awful, so I sent flowers and an apology."

Jenny, get a backbone! How could that fucking hurt your feelings. That would make me fucking laugh! It's like if Courtney Love called Whitney Houston a crack head!

[Female First]

I think we've heard this before!

Julia Roberts apparently will quit acting for good to raise her twins. She has just finished voice-over work on Charlotte's Web and is now preparing for her Broadway debut next spring in Three Days of Rain. Apparently after she completes her role in that play, she's done!

Haven't we heard this shit before? Didn't she go away for a long time and then came back with that hideous movie I Love Trouble. She's not gone, she wants the dough!

[Female First]

Oliver Stoner

Mega-director and pothead Oliver Stone pleaded no contest to a marijuana charge. Last May, Oliver was pulled over by cops and they found the green shit in his car. No formal charges have been brought against him and he has been ordered to pay $100 plus court costs.

Oliver is no stranger to being caught with the green. In 1999 Oliver was caught with the shit and was ordered to rehab.

You know Oliver and Angie got their smoke on!

[BBC News]

The Dlisted Report

Ian Holm has dropped out of the CBS mini-series John Paul II due to personal reasons. Jon Voight will replace him. Shooting is currently underway in Poland. [Variety]

Bill Murray is in negotiations to return to the voice of Garfield for the sequel. Breckin Meyer and Jennifer Love Hewitt have already signed on to return. Billy Connelly has also joined the cast with a release date set for July 2006. [The Hollywood Reporter]

Amy Heckerling has cast Paul Rudd to star opposite Michelle Pfeiffer in I Could Never Be Your Woman. Tracey Ullman, Fred Willard, Stacey Dash and Saoirse Ronan also star. The film follows a mother (Pfeiffer) who falls for a younger man (Rudd) while her daughter (Ronan) falls in love for the first time. Ullman plays Mother Nature, who meddles in their fates. [The Hollywood Reporter]

Liam Neeson is reportedly Steven Spielberg's first choice for the role of Abraham Lincoln in the Lincoln biopic. Shooting is expected to begin next spring. [Dark Horizons]

Claire Danes will star in a Off-Broadway play entitled Christina Olson: American Model. The Christina of the title is the famous subject of Andrew Wyeth's painting "Christina's World," one of the most iconic art images of the 20th century. The painting shows Christina lying in a field of grain, stretching one arm out in the direction of a distant farmhouse. The work does not indicate the reality of Olson's life, that she suffered from muscular deterioration that left her limbs weak. Performances start in September. [Playbill]

R.I.P. Sarah from Big Brother



Sarah's Bio

Hot Slut of the Day!



Skipper

Birthday Sluts



Elvie Bartholomew (3)
Dominique Swain (25)
Casey Affleck (30)
Pete Sampras (34)
Peter Krause (40)
Dana Ivey (63)

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Radar and Janice Dickinson


It's a fucking long ass interview, but read this shit. It's good. She is so fucking hot and crazy!

RADAR ONLINE: What exactly is it that separates a supermodel from your
average model?

JANICE DICKINSON: Back in the day I was doing runway, editorial,
advertising, spokesmodeling, and public appearances. Those are five
different categories. Your Twiggys and your Lauren Huttons weren't
doing that. I was Versace's muse, I was Valentino's muse, I was
Alaia's muse, Lancetti's muse, Calvin Klein's, Halston's. I
could go on and on.

Why do UPN and VH1 refer to you as "one of the world's first supermodels" and "self-proclaimed first supermodel"? Are there other models trying to lay claim to the title?

I am the world's first supermodel. These network people are just
angry people who were not around during the disco days and didn't see
that I was truly on the cover of every single magazine. They can say
anything they want on America's Next Top Model. I don't give a
rat's ass; I know who I am. I worked for Vogue.

Is modeling today different from what it was at the height of your career?

Models have it so easy today. They're getting paid five times what I
did, though in actuality the era of the super-model is over. It died
with Heidi Klum and Gisele. You no longer see any of the super,
warriorlike women walking around. The girls are getting smaller and
smaller.

Shorter?

Not shorter. Their personalities are getting smaller. And they're all
a bunch of drug-addict anorexics-which is actually not much different
from what I was in my day. But now they're handpicking them from the
age of 14 and they're just these dull, Calvin Klein, heroin-chic
duds.

So can the girls who win America's Next Top Model actually make it in the business?

Absolutely not. They are not of the caliber I was, or even of what Tyra
was.

Are they even good enough to be working models?

No. America's Next Top Model is good TV. But it's not 7th Avenue.

Why did you leave the show?

I got fired. At first it was a trip. I believed in the show and it was
fun. But after a few episodes I began getting labeled a bitch, and that
got to me. I was just telling the truth and I was saving these girls
from going out there and being told that they're too short, too fat,
their skin's not good enough. I was to ANTM what Simon Cowell is to
American Idol.

It's too bad. I think viewers loved that bitchiness.

I'd rather be an honest bitch than some ass-kissing, sugarcoating,
namby-pamby, wiping-ass motherfucker. I made the show number one in 52
countries. And then I got the sack, and the UPN executives replaced me
with Twiggy. No one in America knows who Twiggy is. There's no way
anyone could fill my shoes. There's no way.

Was there anyone on the show who was particularly hard to work with?

All of them.

Really? Even Tyra?

Tyra's no walk in the park. Tyra's really righteous.

Why did you decide to subject yourself to The Surreal Life?

I did it for the money-it's just 12 days. My two children asked me
not to do it, because they know that people are having sex and drinking
on the show and I'm in a program and I don't really feel like
having sex with anybody-midgets or Jose Canseco or Omarosa.

How was living with Omarosa?

She's toxic. I thought it was Mr. Ed at first. I think that
Omarosa's goal was to go after each person separately because
that's what she does best.

Is she doing it on purpose, or is she naturally wretched?

Both. Behind the scenes I lent her my hair and makeup guys, you know,
to help her out. And after she said disgusting things about my children
and accused me of freebasing in the bathroom-which I wasn't-she
came to me behind the scenes and asked if I hated her. And I was like,
um, yeah.

What about the other "supermodel" on the show with you, Caprice?

Caprice is not a supermodel. She's some girl who developed a fake
accent after moving to England, like Madonna.

What about Balki?

Who?

Bronson Pinchot-you know, Balki from Perfect Strangers. Your castmate?

Oh. I don't like this guy. This guy is a gimp motherfucker. I made it
very clear to the producers that I would not be groped or molested or
have sex with anyone-that was in my contract. The minute I walked in,
Balki or whatever he's called started groping me. A few days in he
asked me, "Why are you so angry?" And I said, "At you? Because
you're a fucking pervert."
GUESS WHO?

So you hated everyone?

I liked Pepa. I liked Corey Hart. But you'll see on the last episode,
there was this blowout and none of the cast members stuck up for me.
None of them had any backbone as far as I'm concerned. Well you know
what? Fuck you all, then! [Glares at the VH1 publicist] They're
pissed that I'm not promoting the show here, but I don't give a
shit. I don't care. They don't pay well at all for
publicity-there were no meals, nothing's comped.

Were they cool with you bringing your two stylists with you on set?

No, but where I go they go. Without Duke and Gabriel I am nothing. I am
fake, fake, fake. I need my hair and makeup team; I'm not sitting
around barefaced under fluorescent light for no one, honey.

I recently read your autobiography, No Lifeguard on Duty. How did your family feel about your revealing its dysfunction to the world? Particularly your dad's abusive behavior?

Clearly I upset both my sisters by announcing to the world that my
pedophile father was raping my older sister on a practically daily
basis. Clearly I have unresolved issues and maybe some anger issues
about men. For years I kept a secret of incest inside my house. Young
people should not be held captive inside a house of secrets. That's
what led me to a life of alcohol and drug abuse until a few years ago.

And that's when you wrote the book.

That was when I took my notes to Judith Regan and proposed a cautionary
tale of incest. She added sex, drugs, rock 'n' roll, and Studio 54.

You reveal that you were partly responsible for your father's death. Were you nervous putting that in print?

I threw his heart medication pills out the car window, and he had a
heart attack that night and died. By the time I wrote the book, the
statute of limitations was up.

Jeez.

Yeah. I've had a tough life. I walked some of the hardest pavements
in the world to become a model, and that's why I'm entitled to say
the things I do, whether it's to grope-boy Balki on The Surreal Life
or to some wannabe on America's Next Top Model. Eat that, Tyra.

[Radar]

Who is the ugliest young celeb?

And the winner is....



Thanks for voting, y'all!

Heartless!!!!



5 Orphans who were a part of ABC's Extreme Makeover: Home Edition are suing both ABC and the family that took them in.

The five kids “say that the producers took advantage of the family’s hard-luck story and promised them new cars and other prizes to persuade them to participate in the program,

The kids were taken in by Firipeli and Lokilani Leomiti and claim the couple only took them in to increase their chances of being selected. “the suit claims that the Leomitis used the children to increase their chances of being selected for the program.” And “shortly after production wrapped the Leomitis began working to evict the Higgins children — who are black and at the time ranged in age from 14 to 21 — through physical abuse and name-calling, including repeatedly using a racial epithet.”

Damn, that's cold! But a good idea nonetheless!

[Reality Blurred]

Kimora Lee Gross is a free woman!




Kimora Lee Simmons has worked out a deal with prosecutors so the bitch won't have to spend some time in jail. Ugh, that sucks because Lil' Kim and her ass could've been roomies. Kimora pleaded guilty on Tuesday and agreed to 6-Months probation for careless driving and possession of marijuana.

Charges will be dropped if Kimora does a good job on probation.

God, I thought I could never hate someone as much as Charlotte Lurch. But, guess what? Charlotte is fucking Santa Maria compared to this bitch! Kimora was just a young boy who got lucky by nabbing a rich man that happened to be into trannies!

[New York Daily News]

Who is Reese hiding from?

"Ahaha, I'll fool those damned paparazzo!" - Reese







[Lime-Light]

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!



Kimora Lee Simmons will stop at nothing to make sure Baby Phat's winter line includes trendy bear fur vests. - Anonymous 5:24pm

That's what you get!

Charlotte Lurch has apparently been cut the fuck off! Charlotte is spending too much and her advisors have put that shit on hold. Apparently that miserable bitch spent nearly $2 Million dollars this year. Her advisors want her to learn "the value of money"

Bitch needs to learn the fucking "value of human life" as well.

Her advisors have reportedly frozen her assets and told her that her money won't be leaving the bank until she can be more responsible with it.

Keep an eye out sluts! You know she'll be hitting KMart soon!

[Ananova]

Then lay off the crack!

Renee Zellweger has said she misses her full figure. Renee was forced to put on the bulge for Bridget Jones and the sequel and now says she was sexier than.

Renee was sad after she lost all the weight and had to throw away her D-cup bra. She went from a size 14 to a size 6. More like a size 0!

She said: "I was looked at by men so much more when I had something under my blouse."

Um, you can get your figure back by laying off the crack you stupid bitch! This isn't rocket science.

[Ananova]

Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies..

Matt LeBlanc is apologizing to his wife, because he is a fat fuck! No, because he apparently got jiggy with a stripper. Who hasn't?! Matt tells The Sun that he and 10 of his friends visited a strip club in Canada when things got a little out of hand. Why does this shit always happen in Canada? Didn't Affleck get into trouble with a Canadian stripper as well? Damn those Canadians! You're worse than Angelina Jolie!

Matt said, that a stripper lured his ass to the back room and tried to seduce him. Duh!

He said: "She was all over me. I was drinking and she was crossing the line strippers shouldn't normally cross. She was in my face, pushing her breasts into me, grabbing my hands to go all over her body." "If I had been sober perhaps I'd have acted quicker. I realized I was being careless and had to get the hell out of there." "I acted like a fool in allowing myself to be led astray and placed in such a horrible situation. I feel ashamed."

Matt is smart, because you know he boned the slut. So he's covering his tracks just in case this stripper comes forth saying she boned Matt LeBlanc.

Jude should've thought of that shit.

[The Sun]


Will this cunt ever learn?


Courtney Love has been ordered to return to court later this month after the stupid bitch violated her probation by not passing her drug test. This bitch is a dumb slut and deserves to be thrown in jail! The fucking judge is giving your ass a chance, Jesus! She should just lock herself in a padded room for 60-days so she won't go near a drug.

You know this bitch is sniffing freon as well!

Only a week ago, Courtney said this:

Pea-Nuts

The ex-wife of Jose Canseco, says the former major-league baseball player left out a tiny detail from his autobiography Juiced which was about his steroid abuse. Jessica says that Jose had the smallest nuts she'd ever seen, like almost non-existent.

Jessica told Playboy: "Jose's were non-existent. They're not there . . . It wasn't until we separated and I dated that I realized it . . . With other guys I was like, 'Wow, those are some very large . . .' "

Shouldn't they have implants for those the way there are titty implants for chicks. I mean this is a major problem! I hate small nuts, but I guess it can make your package look bigger. A big plus is she could probably put his dick and his nuts in her mouth at once! That's enough to make a bitch feel like she's accomplished something!

[Page Six]


Guess the Celebrity?

Please let this be good!

I pray to the heavens that this movie is hot shit, because I loved the book! I'm a little skeptical on the cast, but whatever. Rob Marshall is the director and the cast includes Zhang Ziyi, Ken Watanabe, Michelle Yeoh, Gong Li and Karl Yune. It will be released this December.











[Latino Review]

The Dlisted Report

CBS has announced the 16 men and women competing in Survivor: Guatemala. CBS had originally said there would be 20 cast members which leads many to believe that last year's contestants Bobby Jon and Stephanie will be coming back. The show will debut on September 15th. Click to see the contestants. [CBS]

Freddy Rodriguez, Jeffrey Wright, Sarita Choudhury and Mary Beth Hurt have joined M. Night Shyamalan's Lady in the Water. The flick stars Paula Giamatti and Bryce Dallas Howard. The plot revolves around a super of an apartment building who finds a sea nymph in swimming pool. The film will be released next summer. [Variety]

Heidi Klum will host Germany's Next Top Model a version of America's Next Top Model. Heidi is currently filming the second season of Project Runaway. [Cynthia's Cynopsis]

Panty Man gets the Beat Down!



This story is the epitome of white trash. It has everything a good white trash story needs.

Our tale begins with young Bruce Taylor and our tale is set in Oklahoma. Now, let's meet Maria and Carlos Isordia, a married couple. One night Maria noticed that some of her bras and panties were missing. She didn't think anything of it, but she kept a mental note. The next night she noticed that more of her bras and panties were missing. This went on for 5 consecutive nights and Maria finally told her husband. They both came to the conclusion that somebody was panty nabbing her ass!

So Carlos set up a lil' trap for our panty thief using only a coffee cup, string and bra. Picture that! That's like a fucking cartoon! Well, the trap worked and after Bruce Taylor fell for it, Carlos beat his ass down using a leg from his baby's crib. Priceless!

Well, Bruce Taylor was arrested and is now facing prison time. When police searched his house (or trailer most likely) they found 55 pounds of underwear! Damn, he's like Victoria's Secrets.

And that ends our tale of the white trash panty thief!

Thanks to CLB!

[The Smoking Gun]

Attack of the Clones!

Reader Becky e-mailed me and told me exactly who she thinks Kfed is channeling. Jermaine DuPree! I must say she is spot on in many ways, but at least JDu has some kind of talent!







Thanks to Becky!

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!!



What? Would you rather be wearing an ass on your head? - Amanda


R.I.P. Brandon from Rock Star: INXS



Brandon's Bio

Hot Sluts of the Day



Lori & Reba Schapell

Birthday Sluts




Hulk Hogan (52)
Carolyn Murphy (30)
Viola Davis (40)

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

MILFs gone wild!

Cindy Crawford went fucking wild in St. Tropez. Damn, all that champagne is going to waste! She's so fucking selfish!





[A Socialite's Life]

Eh...keep the shirt on!

We all thought Jack Osbourne has been looking hot lately. But he should really keep his clothes on. At least he doesn't have man boobs anymore. He probably got those chopped off. He does need a little lipo in the gut area, but overall keep your clothes on Jack.

Oh and tell that sister of yours she needs the same boob reduction you got!





[Just Jared]

That HoHan is so cute!

"I'm not going to deny the fact that I've tried pot. I hated it. But never cocaine. I've seen my father (Michael Lohan). I've seen how it messes families up. If I hadn't had experienced that, I may have gone down a different route. But I've literally seen how it tore my parents apart." - HoHan

This is almost as good as Brittany Murphy saying she doesn't even know what cocaine looks like!

HoHan probably thinks that "coke" and "cocaine" are two different things. In defense of her, the bitch is right!

Cindy Crawford's still got it!

The Cin is on vacay in St. Tropez and is showing these young sluts how it's really done! Damn, she looks hot. Her face is aging, but not her body! Do you think she ever took a match to the gerbils that were crawling up Richard Gere's arse?



[Lime-Light]

Nip Slip!

Mischa Barton style!!





[Lime-Light]

Marky Mark is like 5'2''

Last night was The Four Brother premiere in NYC. Marky Mark is seriously a midget. I never realized how short that bitch was!



He's not looking too hot these days...



Guess who else was there...



She loves the black guys or is it that the black guys love her?

Attack of the Clones!



Thanks to Markus


Vintage Donatella

Damn it's a slow newsday people! Bear with me....

Apparently when Donatella Versace was a coke whore she had a memorable moment in the office of Vogue Editor Anna Wintour's office. Apparently, the bitch walking into Anna's glass desk sending shards of glass everywhere!!! Holy shit, I wish that was on tape.

Also, Donatella's current new diet consists of thinly sliced vegetables roasted until they are black and then microwaved? Why even eat?

[NY Daily News]

Nicky did not do this!



Page Six reports..

NICOLE Kidman jumping out of her front-row seat at the Garden, grabbing her crotch and dancing "hip-hop style" to Eminem

Nu-uh! If so, that shit would be funny!

Dickmatized or something...

Kate Moss seems to be back with that deadbeat Pete Doherty! The two have been seen kissing around town after a couple of weeks ago it was reported that she had dumped him once and for all!

A source said:"It's been a tough few weeks for Pete. He split with Kate, sacked his manager and band and got arrested for fighting a reporter. Kate still thinks she can sort out Pete and all his problems.."

Kate he better be giving you good dick, because he's just crazy!

[Ananova]

The Dlisted Report

Julia Stiles and Liev Schreiber are in talks to star in the remake of the classic horror film The Omen for director John Moore. Filming will begin this October and will be retitled to The Omen 666 and released on 6/6/06. How clever! [Variety]

Leelee Sobieski and Ellen Burstyn have joined Nicolas Cage in Neil Labute's The Wicker Man. It is a remake of a 1973 British horror film that centers on a police officer (Cage) who is investigating the disappearance of a girl in a small cultlike community. [The Hollywood Reporter]

According to a TVGuide/Bravo poll Clay Aiken was voted the most popular reality show contestant ever. Omarosa was voted the most hated ever! [Reality Blurred]

Guess the Celebrity?

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!!



President Bush proving he also does not have a Weapon of Mass Destruction... - Anonymous 2:48pm

Congratulations to Jaret for winning I Want to be a Hilton!



Jaret's Bio

Finally this shit is over!

Hot Slut of the Day!



Dom DeLuise!

Birthday Sluts



Justin Theroux (34)
Devon Aoki (23)
Angie Harmon (33)
Antonio Banderas (45)
Rosanna Arquette (46)
Diane Venora (53)

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Scarlett gets a facial!



Yes it's photoshopped!

[Oh No They Didn't]

Brody digs for gold...

either that or talent to give to Mischa Barton...



[Lime-Light]

Heidi Klum preggers and loving it!

Here's Heidi Klum showing Brit Brit how it's done. She's 7 months preggers here and took the pics for the September issue of Vitals magazine. She's a dirty dirty girl and I love it!



[Pop Sugar]

KFed got his hair did!

He's just one step closer to becoming Ludacris.



[Lime-Light]

Doesn't she know she looks like an idiot with those sunglasses?

She's just fucking with us now! Even her pooch can't look her in the face or he'll bust up laughing and then he'll be put down!



Matthew McConaughey got body!

Even a dyke like Penelope Cruz can appreciate a man like this. He strikes me as being dumb as dirt though! And a major pothead, but who cares he's got one of the hottest bods in Hollyweird!



It's Radar again! Loves it!



[Gawker]

What the hell kind of GD outfit is that?

What the hell is Mr. Paris thinking? He looks like a straight-up Kriss Kross reject! Oh Kriss Kross was hot!



[Go Fug Yourself]

My boobs are real and they're fabulous!

Jessica Simpson loves her breasts and especially because they are real. So she says.

She said: "“Mine are definitely real. At school my boobs were bigger than all my friends’ and I was afraid to show them. Now, I feel they make my outfits look better. They'’re like an accessory."

Kind of like your husband is just an accessory as well?

Her creepy father stuck his foot in his mouth by saying: "“When we were in church work [my daughters] wore bikinis and short shorts," he said. "People in the church got mad at me then but we believe that what’s in the heart is more important than what’s on the outside."

He is a minister! You know he told his daughters to wear g-strings and pasties for him. He is a nasty man! Ugh, you know he seceretly wants to do his daughters!

[Scoop]

More like 4 inches!

Remember the rumors that Mike Tyson was hung long. And when I say long...I mean 14 inches long! Well, yeah right! Here's a pic of Mike looking more like pony hung than horse hung! Maybe he's a grower, but my expert opinion thinks not. There's no way that thing can grow to 14 inches. Unless it's growing in a pump! Stop your lies Mike! Just stop! Stop right now! Oh shit don't hit me!



[Pic: Proceed at your own risk]

Take that Jude!

One of Jude's baby mamas has dumped her boyfriend after two-years together. Sadie Frost will not be upstaged by Jude's break-up so she has let go of her 24yo boy toy. Sadie is 40.

A source said: "Sadie has just turned 40 and has finally got everything sorted with her divorce. "She just felt it was time to move on with her life and her relationship with Jackson has run its course."

Expect Sadie to announce her pregnancy to Jackson and then get back with his ass. Actually Sadie should get back with Jude - now that will be hot. Homewreck the home that wrecked yours! Brilliant!

[Sky Showbiz]

Guess the Celebrity?

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!!



The disclaimer on my deodorant: Please note that Old Spice is not tested on animals, just elderly women. - Zimmy

Keira Knightley is single!

20yo Keira Knightley is heartbroken after her two-year romance with model Jamie Doran has ended.

A source close to her said: "Keira is gutted. She really thought what she and Jamie had was love, but it just wasn't meant to be.". "They both wanted it to work but in the end it was untenable". "They were having crisis talks almost daily and a decision was reached to finally call it a day".

The reason for the split is because they hardly saw each other and Keira hasn't been in the press much so a good break-up would surely get her name in some papers! Expect for her to be seen out with a hunky leading man next. Ugh, Hollyweird is so predictable!

[Female First]

DUH!


Rita Crosby, Eleanor Cook & Ray Hultman

Two jurors of the Michael Jackson case are regretting their decision to acquit him. They fear that they may be putting a pedophile back on the streets. Um duh! Eleanor Cook and Ray Hultman are former jurors and both are writing books on the incident. I don't get this, how could jurors write an entire book about being a juror. I guess it could be someone interesting. But seriously, I can get all my info from watching Best Week Ever.

Eleanor was asked if the other jurors would be angry about her claim and she said: "They can be as angry as they want to. They ought to be ashamed. They're the ones that let a pedophile go. I just really think Jackson is a danger to young boys. It breaks my heart to even think about him being around young boys".

Yeah, but I'm sure your heart will be all mended up once you receive your first advance. Stupid bitch!

[Female First]

Joe Simpson: Pro Milker

Joe Simpson is milking the whole lip-synching-Ashlee thing by focusing on that incident to help promote Ashlee's album In Another Life. Apparently two tracks called Beautifully Broken and Who Will Help Me When I Fall is about that whole incident.

"There's no way to run away from failure, because in everyone's life, you're going to meet it," he told MTV. "So we try to teach our girls the way to do it is head on. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and go at it."

What he meant to say was. "Everybody knows Ashlee doesn't have talent, so we need something to sell these records! So how about bringing up the past over and over! Hey it worked for the whole Jessica fucking Knoxville thing."

Joe Simpson gives me the creeps!

[Page Six]

The Dlisted Report

After only 2 episodes NBC has decided to pull the plug on The Law Firm, but it will show the remaining episodes on Bravo. [LA Times]

Sigourney Weaver and Ioan Gruffudd will join David Duchovny in the independent feature TV Set. The story follows the making of a television pilot, with Duchovny playing the pilot's beleaguered showrunner. Weaver will play the head of a network, and Gruffudd will play a BBC executive who joins the network. Judy Greer is in talks to join the cast. Shooting begins August 18th. [The Hollywood Reporter]

Producer Charles Roven has said that a sequel for Batman Begins is on the fast track. All actors have signed on for another one and they are just waiting for an OK from Christopher Nolan. He was mum about possible new characters being brought on. [Dark Horizons]

Hot Slut of the Day!



Princess Ann Claire

Birthday Sluts



Eric Bana (37)
Audrey Tatou (27)
Divine Brown (36)
Gillian Anderson (37)
Melanie Griffith (48)
Sam Elliott (61)

Monday, August 08, 2005

Heath Bar!




Is Heath Ledger engaged to his baby mama Michelle Williams? The very hot Coat Sara sent me this pic of Michelle sporting an engagement ring. Her baby is do real soon, sometime this fall. So it makes sense that they would get married. But expect these two bitches to be divorced by next year.

Gawd, I'm awful. His heart belongs to Naomi Watts and her heart belongs to Krispy Kreme!

Thanks again Coat Sara!

A Name You Can Trust





[Gallery of the Absurd]

X marks the spot!

Is that Brit drinking some Boones farms while preggers? Let's hope it's cran-apple! Oh this pic was taken at her baby shower!



And Brit Brit let it all hang out while on a boat. She actually looks but, but I know you bitches will tear her a new one. Let the bashing begin!





[Pics: Just Jared]

It's The Gyllenhaal!

Playing baseball of course! So all can drool. But the drooling will stop once you've seen that skank Kiki!









Robin Strasser is crazy!



For all of you bitches that watch One Life to Live you know of the amazing Robin Strasser who plays the infamous Dorian Lord! Well, Robin has her own hotline and it's AMAZING! If you're feeling down, call this shit!

It's local to NYC: (212) 414-5300

Big thanks to Lahoma00!

A Match Made in STD Heaven!

Anna Nicole and Dennis Rodman!

Stealing the Spotlight!

Comedy Central's roasting of Pamela Anderson was last night, but you would've thought it was The Courtney Love show! Let the pics speak for themselves!



Bea Arthur was there! Sweet!



And here's a story of a crackhead named Courtney..



Who looks like she basically just got out of bed. But she probably just rolled out of the dumpster.



An instant shrug and barf!



With Courtney coming, it should've been a straight-edged party!



Now Pammy not only has the hep, but she has every other virus known to man!



Nothing says class like greasy legs, a ciggie and a shrug pillow.



Maggie the Cat you ain't!






And nothing says WHITE TRASH QUEEN like a diet coke and a Kimberly Stewart on the arm!

Guess the Celebrity?



Thanks to asdf!


Marilyn's Secrets




Marilyn Monroe's
secrets are all coming out after tapes of sessions with her psychiatrist Dr. Ralph Greenson have been released to prosecutors. Among some of the secrets revelead are:

About Orgasms: "Bless you doctor. What you say is gospel to me. By now I've had lots of orgasms. Not only one but two and three with a man who takes his time."

About Clark Gable: "I woke up crying. He was so nice to me and I didn't deserve it. When I came back from a day off set, he patted my a*s and told me if I didn't behave myself he'd give me a good spanking. I looked him in the eye and said, 'Don't tempt me.' He burst out laughing so hard he was tearing. "I wanted him to be my father. I wouldn't care if he spanked me as long as he made up for it by hugging me and telling me I was daddy's little girl and he loved me. Of course, that's fantasy."

About Shakespeare: "I'll take a year of day and night study at Shakespeare with Lee Strasberg. I'll pay him to work only with me. He said I could do Shakespeare. I'll make him prove it. That will give me the basics Olivier wanted. Then I'll go to Olivier for the help he promised. Then I'll produce and act in the Marilyn Monroe Shakespeare Film Festival."


The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!!



The tall goofy brother from "Hansen" finally finds something he is good at...the WNBA. - Anonymous 4:50pm

Sienna is Dickmatized!

Apparently Sienna Miller has decided to take back her cheating ex-beau Jude Law. They deserve each other! She's a cheating slut too! They are giving it another go and Sienna wants to take things day by day. Jude is so desperate to get back into her good graces that he may take a stage role opposite her in As You Like It which Sienna is currently starring in.

In other Jude news, Daisy Wright the nanny that rode Jude's man-member is set to tell her story on US TV. What's to tell? "I rode Jude's Man Member." That's the end of the story!

[Female First and Ireland Online]

Stop this Insanity!

Sources claim that Angie Jolie is knocked up with Brad Pitt's baby. But she just bought a baby! Why does she need another one? She's like Mother Goose! Apparently Angie moved in with Brad last month, because the couple are expecting a little bundle of joy.

A source said: "They spend hours in the bedroom - she's a very sexual lady. They just don't seem to be able to get enough of each other. And word is she is now pregnant".

Angie only agreed to move in with Brad, because she is knocked up and she wanted free rent.

I don't think she's preggers at all. Maddox Jolie would not stand for this! He'd move out pronto! He can take Zahara, but another one? Hell to the No!

[Female First]

Leave it to Brit Brit



Brit Brit and Kfed were hosting a party to welcome their child into their white trash world in Malibu when a paparazzi photographer was shot in the leg with a pellet gun. Photog, Brad Diaz, was shot while trying to take pictures of the party. He immediately called for 911 and was taken to a hospital, but doctors said the pellet was too deep to remove and now it may cause permanent damage.

Officers swarmed the party afterwards leaving Brit Brit dazed and confused. Especially since she had a few bong hits. Brit Brit immediately started to cry, especially when Diaz threatened to sue for millions.

Diaz said: "I am just in shock I cannot believe this has happened I am convinced the shot came from Britney's security guards I am definitely going to press charges"

He then went on to say "I'm a millionaire now and I'm going to Disneyland!" He didn't say that. Hah.

[MTV]

Page Six Blind Items..You Guess...I Guess..

WHICH famed fashionista went back on heroin after his top design assist ant defected to a rival rag house?

I Say: Karl Lagerfeldt

WHICH '80s heartthrob actor had a jarring sexual experience while on a recent overseas jaunt? He awoke to find the woman he'd brought back to his hotel room urinating on him.

I Say: Charlie Sheen

WHICH hot young actress isn't as virginally pure as she'd like everyone to think? The fashionable young lady used to live in New York in an apartment with nine male models — and shagged them all.

I Say: Katie Holmes

[Page Six]


The Dlisted Report

The critics tore Dukes of Hazzard apart, but it still reigned at the box office scoring the #1 spot and bringing in $30.5 Million domestically. Wedding Crashers dropped to the #2 spot with $16.5 Million and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory added $10.5 more Million to its total to come in at #3. [Box Office Mojo]

Meryl Streep is racking up the roles lately. She's currently starring in Robert Altman's Prarie Home Companion and is set up for the lead in The Devil Wears Prada. She has just signed to Dirty Tricks playing Martha Mitchell the whistle-blowing wife of Nixon chief of staff John Mitchell. Annette Bening and Gwyneth Paltrow have also joined the cast. Shooting should start next spring. [Variety]

It's a gay attack! Rosie O'Donnell will join Harvey Fierstein in Fiddler on the Roof playing Golde. This is awful awful casting. Rosie will begin performances on September 10th and play until January when the show closes. [Playbill]

Peter Jennings is in heaven!

How did this happen? This is sad.



Read entire story at MTV

R.I.P. Rob from The Cut


Rob's Bio

Hot Slut of the Day!



Helen Reddy

For Warren

Birthday Sluts



J.C. Chasez (29)
Countess Vaughn (27)
Lindsay Sloan (28)
Drew Lachey (29)
Faye Wong (36)
Deborah Norville (47)
Dustin Hoffman (68)

Sunday, August 07, 2005

The Scientologists threw a party!

And where was TomKat? Who knew Jenna Elfman was one of them? She'll do anything for a role!



AND Erika Christiansen?! What the hell? They are everywhere!

Is Justin, Brit Brit's Baby Daddy?

I received an interesting e-mail... This little note stated that Justin Timberlake may be Britney's baby daddy. That during around the time she conceived her baby, Brit Brit and Justin hooked up because both of them were on the outs with their prospective mates.

This is a little far-fetched, but it would be so hot if it was true. So if Brit Brit's baby comes out pretending to be a hip-hop thug we know who the baby daddy is. Actually, that won't help us. Ok, if the baby comes out pretending he can bust a move we know who the baby daddy is. Ok, that won't help us either. Goshdarnit! We'll never know!

Hot Slut of the Week: Sharon Mitchell



Age:
49
Birthday: January 18, 1956
Birth Name: Sharon Mitchell

Original Date of Hot Slut of the Day: August 3, 2005
Claim to Fame: She is considered to be one of the major adult stars of her time. She has starred in over 500 fillms.

Where is she now? Co-founded the nonprofit Adult Industry Medical Healthcare Foundation, which has a $1.4 million annual budget and provides testing for sexually transmitted diseases along with drug and psychological counseling for porn actors.

Why is she Hot Slut of the Week? Because she looks like a dude and is a smart bitch!

Has Tara Reid found love?!?

Tara Reid's in Italy and she may just have found love! Ok not with this guy, but she totally gave him a hand job in the men's room.



Here is Tara and her new paramour! I hope he has all his shots! Cause she doesn't!



He's using her ass!



Tara, get your tits fixed already!



Ooof, he's as gay as Michael K in a flower shop!



I didn't know Fruit of the Loom made polo shirts!

Enough with the PDA already!

Paris we know you're a slut! And how many times have I told you not to wear your grammy's nightgown out in public! That's for sexy times!







[Lime-Light]

Mel Gibson is God

Our favorite Catholic, Mel Gibson has been asked to stage the Crucifixion of Christ for a major Catholic gathering in 2008.

Gibson's staging of the Stations of the Cross, a live interpretation of Christ's final hours, would be part of a bid by the city to secure the Catholic Church's World Youth Day in 2008, the Sydney Morning Herald reported.

The crucifixion reenactment similar to scenes from Gibson's hugely successful film "The Passion of the Christ" would begin with the Last Supper staged at Sydney's landmark Opera House at sunset, and would end with the crucifixion of Christ at St. Mary's Cathedral, according to bid documents the newspaper said it obtained.

Shouldn't his whole "Christ" thing be over now. Did any of you see this film? It was good and all, sort of... but let's just move on Mel. Bring back Mad Max! Shit, that's the Mel I like!

[Yahoo]

Hot Sluts of the Day!



Patsy and Edina!

For Warren

Birthday Sluts



David Duchovny (45)
Eric Johnson (26)
Charlize Theron (30)
Rachel York (34)
Harold Perrineau Jr. (37)



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