My Dollywood

So I finally has some pics to post of my trip to Dollywood. The players are myself, Markus, Lookee, Dr. Jennifer & KK. Enjoy! Click on them to see bigger version.

The Other Carey!

Here's Mariah's sister, Alison Carey's mugshot. Alison was arrested AGAIN for turning tricks. Mariah, help a bitch out already!





[JJB]

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!!!

"god damn it! why can't i make a bitch come?" - cicelyfairfield

The MILF List

InTouch has put together a list of what they believe is the hottest bitches over 40. And lo and behold Sharon Stone has topped this list. Some of these people I agree with, but Sheryl Crow? Sheryl Crow looks like a vintage Louis Vuitton bag!

#1 - Sharon Stone
#2 - Marisa Tomei
#3 - Andie MacDowell
#4 - Sheryl Crow
#5 - John Stamos
#6 - Will Smith
#7 - Kristin Davis
#8 - Michelle Pfeiffer
#9 - Tom Cruise
#10 - Loni Anderson

[Contact Music]

Quote of the Day

"My son is in love with Africa, so he
has been asking for an African brother
or sister." - Angelina Jolie

Hot Slut of the Day!

Julie Newmar!

Birthday Sluts

Courtney Love (41)
Fred Savage (29)
Kelly McGillis (48)
Tom Hanks (49)
Jimmy Smits (50)
Chris Cooper (54)
John Tesh (54)
O.J. Simpson (58)
Brian Dennehey (67)

Zsa Zsa please don't die!

People I never ask you for anything. But I am finally going to do so. Please get your fat fucking asses away from this computer and go to your nearest TV and put on a copy of A Very Brady Sequel and pray to it. Pray with all your heart that Zsa Zsa Gabor who suffered a stroke in her home will survive! She is currently in critical condition.

Please Zsa Zsa don't walk towards the light! I know it looks like diamonds, but don't do it! I still have a couple of more years to make fun of your ass!!!

[IMDB]

The Perfect Man

A German company has created my perfect man!

He is a beautiful creature with fur of real gold and eyes of saphire and diamonds. He is worth nearly $80,000!

And I will love you forever if you buy this for me!

[Ananova]

Bennifer Wedding Pic!

Star Magazine has scored the first AWFUL pic of Jenny & Benny confirming their love and legitimizing their bastard child!

[Star Magazine]

Katie is really making me sick!

In the August issue of W Magazine which hits newstands July 22nd, Katie Holmes poses in a wedding dress. The things a bitch needs to go through just to make some dough! God, bitch would've been better off playing mega-millions!

Shatin Emerges!

As the world reported yesterday or was it the day before..anyway..Shar Jackson & Quentin Tarantino were photographed leaving the movies! This is seriously an odd couple. However, Shar has babies to feed so I ain't hating on her!

[JJB]

HoHan Eats!

[JJB]

Tess McGill!

This is the hottest slut ever! I am moving into an office at my job, and as soon as I do I'm calling people and saying "Cyn, guess where I am?"

This Hotel's the Pitt's!

George: "I Love You Brad"
Brad: "Ditto"

George Clooney and his husband, Brad Pitt are going into bidness with Cindy's mole. No, really with Cindy Crawford's hubbby, Rande Gerber. The three are planning to build a hotel and casino in Las Vegas.

The New York Post states: "George and Brad are not putting in any money, but they will be getting a percentage of the profits,"

George and Brad are to be the face of the hotel with Brad consulting on the design concept.

I'm thinking Hotel Keep it on the Down Low. This way, George and Brad have a beautiful and secret love nest they can share!

[Ananova]

The Photoshop Awards: Mariah Carey

[JJB]

Vanity Fair's August Cover!!!

[Gallery of the Absurd]

Spot the Cock?!

Click here for a "bigger" version

[Oh No They Didn't]

Goodyear blimp watch out!

AOL is reporting that Mo'Nique is preggers with fucking TWINS! The baby daddy is not known, however Mo'Nique was dating Gerard Levert a few months ago. But it ain't his ass!

Mo'Nique already looks like she's pregnant! Can you imagine when she gets to be 7 months. She's going to fucking fly off into the sky!

But on a serious note..congrats to Mo'Nique. You are one of the funniest bitches around! Just please wear concrete shoes around your 6th month. I don't want to lose you!

[AOL Black Voices]

Together Forever!

Nicole: "I hate your fucking ass"
Paris: "I hate your ass AND face!"
Honey-Child: "These bitches are stupid."
Tinkerbell: "I hope they drop our asses so finally this misery will end!"

Fox gave Kimberly Stewart a screen test to star alongside Paris Hilton in the next Simple Life. However Fox doesn't think Kimberly has what it takes. And Fox would also have to up the budget since Kimmy's face would break so many lenses.

Fox also asked Paris if she had any other girlfriends that could possibly star and Paris couldn't come up with anybody. Duh, Kimmy was a safe bet because she's ugly as shit and will make Paris look perfect!

So word is now that Nicole Richie is in talks to return to the show. Who watches this shit anymore? I know I don't. So if I don't watch this shit, it must be like sooo terrible. Because I seriously watch anything. If there was a show that involved a monkey washing a cat, I could watch that shit over and over again. And sober!

[Oh No They Didn't!]

Miscommunication?

Herbie Hancock recently recorded a track for Christina Aguilera's upcoming album and said he was "blown" away by her singing abilities.

The Jazz Legend said: "I knew she could sing. I knew she could really sing. But I didn't know she could sing like that. She knocked me out. She did her first take and I said, 'Well, you nailed it."

I think since he's like 120 years old, his quote was miscommunicated. I think he meant to say: "I knew she could blow. But I didn't know she could blow like that. She knocked me out. She blew me. I
nailed that."

[Contact Music]

Cheeto & Redbull

The NY Daily News is reporting that Brit Brit is expecting twins! Brit's rep has not confirmed or denied this shit.

I hope Brit Brit is having twins, only because the names of those two are going to be so hot. Since she's southern, I'm thinking like two-names each. Here are my thoughts:

Cheeto-Lynn & Redbull-Bryan
Pickle-Lane & Toxic-Jean
KFC-James & Mickey-Dee

[New York Daily News]

That's one way to get a girl!

Tommy Lee has revealed how he got Pammy Anderson into his bed! He licked her face! Like a fucking dog!

Tommy said: "I licked her face! It's right to the point. In general, people like to get licked.I absolutely would recommend it."

The only place I like to get licked is where the sun don't shine! And he could've punched Pammy and she probably would've pounced on that! Wait, didn't he punch her ass?

[Female First]

Crack Baby!

Is Whitney Houston really going to ruin another bitches life? Bobby Brown said: "We're trying for another baby. She wants a boy, and I want her to be happy."

It's so gross because on their reality show Bobby is always asking Whitney if he can impregnate her. Like is that supposed to be romantic?

This is not right! Two crackheads can have a baby, but if two men or two women have a baby suddenly this kid is Satan's spawn!

[Female First]

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!!

"Hey, Mariah...I heard you took a picture with some old homeless guy. Imagine the publicity you could get if I just followed you around everywhere and looked hungry and poor? I promise, I'm cheaper than your sister!" - Anonymous 6:25pm

The Dlisted Report

Please not a 9/11 movie! Please! Oliver Stone will direct and Nicolas Cage will star in a movie about the rescue of two police officers from the rubble of the World Trade Center. Awful Awful! [Variety]

Joely Fisher has joined the cast of Desperate Housewives for multiple episodes. She will play Lynette's new boss. [Variety]

Suzanne Somers one-woman show The Girl in the Thunderbird starts performances tonight on Broadway. This bitch is hot. I love to watch her on HSN when I'm drunk! [Playbill]

R.I.P. Devonric & Jon from Kept

Hot Sluts of the Day!

The Fantanas!

Thanks to Karen E for suggestion!

Birthday Sluts

Billy Crudup (37)
Sophia Bush (23)
Milo Ventimiglia (28)
Kathleen Robertson (32)
Joan Osborne (43)
Toby Keith (44)
Kevin Bacon (47)
Angelica Houston (54)
Janice Pennington (60)
Jeffrey Tambor (61)

Dakota Fanning is an alien!

So last night, Michael K, Markus and I went to see War of the Worlds. That bitch Dakota Fanning is a fucking alien! She's so fucking freaky. That's why all the aliens kept chasing her ass---because she's their queen! She's such a stupid bitch in this movie. She's supposed to be ten but she acts four, and she dresses like a hooker. There's one part where she sings. Everyone is so mesmerized by her talents that they are probably going to give this bitch an Oscar, Golden Globe, Tony, Grammy, Emmy and GLAAD Media Award for her performance in War of the Worlds. We have to stop this insanity!

BOUNCE BITCHES BOUNCE!

Here's MK Olsen and her giant boyfriend spending a beautiful day in Hawaii by jumping on a trampoline! MK looks very happy and hopefully she stopped puking her guts out and is finally going to find happiness just like she did as Michelle Tanner!









[JJB]

Alison Carey is the black sheep!

Mariah's older sister Alison has been arrested again for turning tricks! Alison Carey, 43 and HIV+ tried to turn tricks with the wrong dude, an undercover police mans!

A police source said: "She offered to engage in sexual conduct for $250 in cash,"

Alison is no longer close with her sister Mariah nor any one of her other family members. Can't Mariah help this bitch out? That's a cold! Why you gotta do your sister that way?

[The Washington Times]

My African Baby!

Angie: "Hey Brad, let's buy a baby."
Pitt: "Cool"

AP is reporting that Angie & Brad are currently in Ethiopia to pick up their newest purchase, a baby girl name Zahara. Apparently, they filed for paperwork together not just Angie alone. Damn, these sluts move fast! He ain't even divorced and he's already picking out babies with her ass. Well, I ain't hating him because if that's what she wanted from me, I'd fucking take six of those African babies.

Angie is a seductive she-devil! Fuck terrorists, yo ass better watch out for her ass!

UPDATE - Angie adopted this bitch alone. But Brad is still with her ass in Africa!

[AP]

Bam's X spills the beans!

The super hot Rara Avis sent me a link to Bam's Ex-girlfriend telling a Philly radio station that she is confirming that Bam fucked Jessica Simpson and that Jesse fucked Johnny Knoxville too. I somehow don't believe this bitch, because she sounds like trash!

Here's the link and scroll down to the bottom to listen to her!

Celebrity Pit Stains!

Oh No They Didn't! posted some hilarious pics of celebrity pit stains. I especially love the one below from Naomi Campbell. That's bitch sweat!










[Oh No They Didn't!]

Congrats to Chuck & Caitilin for Winning Beauty and the Geek!

This is sad!

Someone to hold your hand while you take a hit of your crack pipe...

Love is a beautiful thing! Apparently Ashley Olsen and Jared Leto have found love in the big apple! Ashley recently broke up with her boyfriend and is now available. Jared has most recently dated Scarlett Johansson. Ashley is all giddy now that she has a new man.

[IMDB]

Gold Digger!

Quentin Tarantino has found love with Kevin Spears' baby mama, Shar Jackson. The two were spotted in Las Vegas hugging and kissing and shit.

A source told Us Weekly: "They were holding hands and acting like a couple They were very touchy-feely".

I wonder what Britney has to say about this:

Brit: "Hey Y'all its Brit Brit, congrats on Kill Bill!"

Shar: "Kill what?"

Brit: "Oh no you didn't bitch!"

[Us Weekly]

Jealous Much?

"Oh My Shanti, my face is going to fall off!" - Madonna at Live 8

At Saturday's Live 8 concert in London, Madge wanted nothing to do with Mariah Carey.

A source overheard the grouch say: "Just let me know when she leaves her trailer, because that's when I'm outta here. I want to be kept as far away from her as possible."

Someone's a little jealous of someone's singing abilities! I thought you were supposed to be all non-judgmental and shit if you were a Kabbalist!

Madonna is a Kabbabitch!

[New York Post]

Stacey Engaged!!

Black Eyed Peas singer and more famously Wild Orchid member Stacey Ferguson is engaged to Las Vegas hunk Josh Duhamel. Josh proposed to her two weeks ago and they are making plans for next year.

Congrats girl and please don't wear a midriff wedding dress!

[Female First]

It's a Hard Rock Life!

Before being Posh Beckham, Victoria had wanted to work at the world famous Hard Rock Cafe as a waitress. But she claims they didn't give her the job, because she was too geeky. Posh ran into a waitress from Hard Rock at Saturday's Live 8 concert.

The waitress said:"Posh tried to get a job with us before she was famous. She was having a laugh about it. She's lovely - we'd give her a job now."

Ok I'm sorry I felt this was newsworthy. I now realize this sucks!

[Contact Music]

Money Back Guarantee!

Pauly Shore is so Shore (ahhhahahhaa) that his new reality show Minding the Store will be funny that he's offering viewers a money back guarantee! If during the course of the show if you fail to laugh, you can send Pauly a self-addressed stamped envelope and he will reply with $1.

Shore says, "I've convinced the network heads at TBS to let me offer this special guarantee. It's our way of saying we value people's television-viewing time, and we know they'll feel their time spent watching Minding The Store is well worth it."

Looks like someone's going to have to file for bankrupcy, real soon!

[Contact Music]

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!!

bush:"whaaa thaa fuuukk??" "which one of ya'll wise crackers put candles around a bagel? Haha..very funny I thought I woke up in jew heaven!"
"Yeeehhaaww Ya'll" - Anonymous 11:56am

Dancing with the Stars Finale! My Thoughts..

So, if you didn't watch that shit last night, you'll be spoiled. Of course that bitch Kelly Monaco won. Now, Kelly is seriously hot. And in those outfits she looked more like a stripper than a ballroom dancer, but hey it works for me. I kind of knew Kelly would go far just because she's an ABC soap star and probably has a strong fan base that will constantly be voting for her. But I didn't think the bitch would win.

Kelly's competition came from Seinfeld's John O'Hurley whom I thought should have won. After their first dance, I felt that John did better and received higher scores than Kelly. Which was fair. Then came the second dance, the free for all which means that they could do whatever they wanted.

So John danced perfectly, I didn't see any mistakes. He scored a 27 out of 30 which I felt was fair. Then came Kelly in her usual skank garb. Kelly made SEVERAL very noticeable mistakes. One being that she was completely off with her partner and if I noticed it the judges must have. But then when it came down to scoring her, I was completely SHOCKED! The bitch received 30 out of 30. How the fuck does this happen when she soooo fucked up!



This is my thinking. I believe that John probably received the most FAN VOTES which means that Kelly needed to come into first place with the judges in order to win. So the producers told the judges to give her all 10s so that she could win. Why would they want her to win? First of all she's an ABC star, keep it in the network. Second of all, she was the underdog and everybody loves that kind of story.

So that leaves my thoughts on the DWTS conspiracy!!!

The Dlisted Report

Clint Eastwood's next flick called Flags of Our Fathers has gotten some of its main cast. Ryan Phillipe, Jesse Bradford and Adam Beach will star. Clint will direct and produce. The plot is basically some patriotic shit about a flag. [Variety]
Pirates of the Caribbean 3 has gotten its pirate villian in Chow Yun-Fat. Both Pirates 2 & 3 are currently shooting back to back until January. [Variety]

Remember that Jennifer Love Hewitt/Brandy fiasco I Still Know What You Did Last Summer? Well, of course Hollyweird is in the planning stages of torturing us with I'll Always Know What You Did Last Summer. What the fuck? But JLove nor none of the other cast members will be returning. Shooting is set to begin this August in Utah. [Film Jerk]

Mia Farrow will return to the Off-Broadway stage in Fran's Bed set to begin performances in September. Julia Stiles will play one of her daughters. [Playbill]

Hot Slut of the Day!

Scott Baio!

For Karen E.

Birthday Sluts

Bill Campbell (46)
Michelle Kwan (25)
Cree Summer (36)
Jorja Fox (37)
Vonda Shepard (42)
Jessica Hahn (46)
Shelley Duvall (56)

Attack of the Clones!

Thanks to Johnpaul for sending me this shit! Check out his blog, it's awesome!

I love you even though your face can burn down a village!

Damn Sheryl Crow be naassstttyyy...

Thanks to the ever lovely Karen E for sending me this!

OH HELL NAW!!!

NEW YORK - Grammy-award winning rapper Lil' Kim was sentenced Wednesday to a year and a day in prison and fined $50,000 for lying to a federal grand jury to protect friends involved in a 2001 shootout outside a Manhattan radio station.

Girl don't worry, I'll bring your ass a cake with a file in it. You know how we do it!

P.S. - Bitch you could've put on some make-up for court! No wonder the judge threw the book at your ass!

[Yahoo]

Is Latricia the New Hilton?

Kathy Hilton and I Want to be a Hilton contestant Latricia were photographed shopping on Robertson in Los Angeles on June 30th. Now the show is already taped and done with. Does this mean Latricia won? I hope so, that bitch is funny!



[Lime-Light]

Mariah Scarey's Painted On Abs!

Not sure if this is photoshopped, but if it ain't..bitch needs to fire her ab artist. I could've done a better job with an old sharpie and some chalk!



[Mariah Daily]

My Name is Nicolette Sheridan and I Will Save Your Life

If any of you bitches find yourself about to get eaten by a great white shark, simply scream for Nicollete Sheridan and your life will be spared! During one of her first meetings with fiancee, Niklas Soderblom, Nicolette saved his fucking life!

She said:"Niklas was on a surfboard and there was a huge great white shark that had come over from Catalina. I was doing my daily three-mile swim and I saw this fin and I swam as fast as I could and punched that shark right in the nose, repeatedly. And saved him!"

Yeah and then after she saved him, they rode on a lovely cloud through a magical land. They stopped to speak with the Mushroom people who gave Nicolette the key to the city and a giant hug. And then this stupid bitch woke her ass up!

[IMDB]

Jessica does Elle!

With yellow hair!



[JJB]

Kimberly Stewart is a GORGEOUS girl!

This bitch is so skanky, it ain't even funny. No matter how much she scrubs herself down, she still looks dirty. However, the bitch is rich and I love me some rich bitches! You're hot KimHo!







[JJB]

Isn't it just like a concert?!

Ana Matronic of Scissor Sisters slammed the gorgeous, Paris Hilton for having no idea what Live 8 was for but attending the concert anyway. And it's true, Paris didn't really know much about it. But she has promised she will study this!

Paris said:"It's such a great cause. It makes you realize how fortunate we are. I want to get more involved in this cause, so I'm going to read all the newspapers while I'm in Athens planning my wedding."

Why is she going to read about this in Athens? Can you only study this shit in Athens? Stop making exuses Paris! We know you're a selfish, dumb cunt! But we still love your ass!

[IMDB]

From the Bottom of My Empty Wallet!

Cindy Adams is reporting that our favorite piece of trailer trash, Britney Spears is broke! Duh, that's because all her and that deadbeat hubby of hers do is go on vacation! The Federline's also recently purchased a $7 Million Malibu Manse. According to Cindy, Britney made a call to her record company to let them know she needed some serious cash. They reportedley want her to cut another record. This is their idea of a money maker? Um..if I was the record company, the conversation would go something like this:

Brit: "Hey Y'all, I need dough"

Michael Record Exec: "And?"

Brit: "I gots childrens, to feed Y'all"

MRE: "Don't even think about cutting a new record. If we do, we'll be the broke bitches. So listen, I think you should do a porn. That will bring in at least a grand."

-long pause-

Brit: "I like pork rinds!"

MRE: "Um..ok..yeah..whatever"

[Cindy Adams]

Angelina loves them babies!

Angie Jolie has apparently agreed to adopt an Ethiopian baby girl orphaned from AIDS. The head of the country's adoption agency said: "The paperwork has gone through. Miss Angelina's request was accepted last week,"

Angie will name her new baby girl "Jenny Aniston." Just kidding! She will name her Zahara Marley according to People Magazine.

How will she hold two kids? I guess one on each side, right? I personally congratulate the lovely Miss Jolie for opening her heart to kids that need her dough the most! Now, please adopt me next!!!

[Yahoo]

Old Ladies are Hot!

Owen Wilson seriously wants to see Helen Mirren's bare breasts! He said he would love to make a movie with her as long as she bares all for him! In his new flick The Wedding Crashers, Owen has a scene with Jane Seymour who disrobes for him and now he just can't get enough of the older women!

He said: "I'd love to work with Helen Mirren. Someone told me she gets naked in all her films. What a bonus. I feel I instinctively must have known that."

[Contact Music]

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!!

Tinkerbell: "Dammit! Why did I have to be sitting downwind? Paris or Kathy just cut one. And they call me a bitch." - Anonymous 12:09pm

R.I.P. Ann & Yvette from I Want to be a Hilton

The Dlisted Report

Tommy Lee Jones has hopped aboard Robert Altman's A Prairie Home Companion, a fictional tale about the final broadcast of Garrison Keillor's radio show. HoHan, Meryl Streep, Woody Harrelson, Kevin Kline, Maya Rudolph, Virginia Madsen & John C. Reilly also star. [Variety]

The TV Show Las Vegas has a new addition. Lara Flynn Boyle will join this fall as the new owner of the Montecito Hotel. Me hopes some hot girl on girl action takes place! [Variety]

Now that Mambo Kings the Musical is no longer Broadway bound that leaves The Broadway Theater open for a new tenant. The Color Purple the Musical will take its place in October. Ooof, a bad idea to an even worse idea! [Playbill]

Hot Slut of the Day!

Rosie Perez!

Birthday Sluts

Sylvester Stallone (59)
50 Cent (30)
Geoffrey Rush (54)

Dlisted's Hot Slut of the Month!

The time has come to name Dlisted's Hot Slut of May. At the right top sidebar, please vote on whom you think should be it. Click on each sluts name to get her bio.

Sluts in Athens!

Tara Reid, Paris Hilton and Mister Paris threw it down in Athens last night. Who the fuck would party with Tara Reid? I would so be afraid she'd give me a skin rash or some shit. I guess if you want a BJ at the end of the night, she's there for ya! What are friends for?

Edward Scissorhands the Ballet!

Matthew Bourne who is famous for his all-male Swan Lake as well as his inventive Nutcracker will present his latest work Edward Scissorhands in London this fall. He will use the original score by Danny Elfman with some new music composed by Terry Davies.

Bourne veterans Sam Archer & Richard Winsor will share the title role, alternating between performances.

This shit sounds hot!

[source]

The Gloria Estefan Show

Page Six is reporting that The Tony Danza Show is in serious doo-doo. Several bitches have been fired from the show including Tony's sidekick Ereka Vetrini. Now sources are saying that Buena Vista TV is already putting together a replacement show starring Gloria Estefan.

A source said: "Everyone had just been told the show was picked up for another year and that ratings in major markets had gone up," they said. "But it wasn't good enough, I guess."

This show is a piece of shit and deserves to be sent to the TV graveyard. I suggest that they bring back The Gabriella Carteris show. Now that was a class act!

[source]

Keep that Hep in the Family!

Are Pammy Anderson & Tommy Lee back together? These two have been spotted all around town hugging and kissing and shit. I personally feel that Pammy & Tommy will always be friends with benefits. Pammy is obviously dickmatized by Tommy and who wouldn't be? That shit is stacked!

P.S. - Tara Reid was probably too skanky for his ass. And you know that's saying A LOT!!!

[source]

Alien Love

TomKat will apparently say their "I Do's" at the Church of Scientology center in Los Angeles next month. A source has said: "Tom has encouraged Katie to embrace our faith and they have both agreed to a Scientology wedding service.
"It has become a prerequisite of Tom's that the closest people in his life should also be Scientologists. He was mortified when Nicole turned her back on his faith but he is overjoyed Katie has embraced it."

Duh, I'd fucking embrace that shit if I was getting $10 Million! I'd fucking run for the Pope of Scientology and some shit!

[source]

Hot Slut of The Week: Carol Channing

Age: 84
Birthday: January 31, 1921
Birth Name: Carol Elaine Channing

Original Date of Hot Slut of the Day: June 26, 2005
Claim to Fame: Being one of Broadway's first hot sluts. She basically was born to play Dolly in Hello Dolly!

Where is she now? Who knows!?!

Why is she Hot Slut of the Week? Because no matter what photo I see of her, it makes me smile!

Courtney baby..I thought you were off drugs!!!

P.S. - This photo was taken June 30th. Some things never change :(

Actually I take that back. This proves nothing! It just proves that even sober, CLove looks like a crackhead!

Two Sluts

Anna Nicole and Paula Abdul are shameless sluts! This is fucking Live 8 and those bitches are worrying about hooking up. However, Paula does look disgusted by kissing Anna Nicole. Like she has any right!?!

LUTHER VANDROSS IS DEAD!

God, being at Dollywood is like living in a bubble. I just found this out now!!!

Page Six Blind Items

WHICH newlywed husband of a TV personality dropped her off at an award show, then went on a tour of gay bars in L.A.? What he didn't realize was that the limo driver had to keep a list of every stop — and that when network execs got the limo bill, the list "looked like a Yellow Page ad of gay bars"

Al Reynolds, husband of Star Jones

WHICH leading man landed his fiancée by giving her a five-year contract for $10 million? Now, she's giving an Oscar-worthy performance acting as if she's really in love with him.

DUH!

WHICH foreign-born sports phenom lies about his age? Though he landed a multimillion-dollar sneaker deal as a 14-year-old, whispers are he's closer to 20.

Freddy Adu

Will fifty cents do?!

Leonardo DiCaprio shocked a young fan recently when she asked for an autograph. Leo was passing through O'Hare Airport in Chicago when a young girl asked him for an autograph. Leo responded with "I don't sign autographs for anyone anymore - unless I get paid."

When the girl told him she wouldn't pay, he told her he wouldn't be signing an autograph then.

This bitch was kidding! And if he wasn't, fuck I would charge for that shit too. Why not? I'd ask for food though, like fried chicken and sometimes I'd request chocolate.

[source]

You'll always have the memories!

Scary Spice isn't doing too well these days. She's just released her latest album in the UK hoping to rekindle her career. But well, it didn't quite make a splash. Not even a tinkle. It only sold 670 copies. And 669 of those copies were purchased by Scary herself and well I purchased the other one. But I got it at discount.

Oh well, looks like Scary will signing up for a Spice Girls reunion sooner than we thought!

[source]

Don't nobody say anything bad about Miss Carey!

Mariah Carey is such a charitable person. Not only did she do Live 8 this weekend, but the bitch found time in her extremely busy schedule to pose with a homeless person. She's like fucking Mother Theresa!

Maddox is seriously the cutest lil' boy in the world!

Ashley is soooo much hotter than MK!

O Anna!!!

Here's this bitch at Live 8. What the fuck was she doing at Live 8? Giving away free blowjobs? Is that her idea of charity? Hey, works for me!

Hmm...could be kind of good...

The Dlisted Report

John Travolta may be playing JR Ewing in the Dallas movie. He's confirmed it, nobody else has.

Drew Barrymore really wants to make another Charlie's Angels. Too bad nobody else cares.

War of the Worlds brought in over $200 Million this past weekend. The Church of Scientology will take half of that, please!

The CAPTION THIS Contest WINNER!!

Those SATC girls will do anything to get back on the air.
Kim snaps publicity photos while Sarah Jessica and Kristen hold a banner advertising for a replacement for Cynthia.
Cynthia will no longer appear on the show because of image problems. (She has gotten very fat and dates a lady hobbit from the shire.) - youmustbitemenow

Hot Sluts of the Last Few Days

Since I was gone Friday through today, I've compiled a list of the Hot Sluts of each Day!

Tuesday, July 5th

Rick Springfield

Monday, July 4th

Lisa Rinna

Sunday, July 3rd

Bridget the Midget

Saturday, July 2nd

Patty Duke

Friday, July 1st

Victoria Rowell

Birthday Sluts

Katherine Helmond (77)
Eva Green (25)
Edie Falco (42)