Top 15 Hot Cartoon Sluts of the 80s!
Lahoma00 here to take you through the top 15 hot cartoon sluts of the 1980s!
Click here to see the list!
#15 Madame Razz (She-Ra: Princess of Power)
Madame Razz always reminded me of Valerie Harper or Madge, the Palmolive lady who told you how well Palmolive cleaned your dishes AND your hands. Razz was that stupid bitch who was always fucking up her spells and talked like an old lady from New York. Here Madame Razz is seen causing disaster, as well as with her lovable companion Broom, who was a homosexual. Madame Razz was a fag hag!
#14 Lady Jaye (GI Joe: A Real American Hero)
Lady Jaye was fucking hot! This bitch could kick your ass with her fists, a gun, or her javelin. In one episode she beat somebody with a purse! My favorite episode was where she and the Baroness got kidnapped; they beat a bunch of robots while Lady Jaye was wearing business casual and Baroness was in a bikini!
Here is Lady Jaye with her boyfriend Flint, but it was all a cover because we know she was a dyke. That’s why she was little boys favorite because she was basically a guy herself! She wanted to fuck Cover Girl!
#13 Woolma Lamb (The Get Along Gang)
Woolma was the snotty bitch of this group, always acting prissy and coming her hair. Once I was in a green room of a talk show and Joan Collins was there, primping and looking in the mirror. She reminded me of this bitch.
#12 Melodia (Silverhawks)
Melodia was one in a long string of MTV inspired cartoon characters. All Melodia did was shriek a lot and play really shitty guitar in outer space. But her hair was hot! Glynne Headley would play her in the movie.
#11 LaLa Orange (Rainbow Brite)
Look at this slut! She thought she was a fucking French lady with her beret but she’s nothing but a Parisian whore! She was always winking and trying to suck Red Butler’s dick!
#10 Carla (Kidd Video)
Kidd Video was seriously one of the hottest cartoons around: Four kids (including Cousin Oliver from the Brady Bunch) get sucked into a cartoon where they play rock n’ roll and run away from Master Blaster and his psycho cats! Carla was the Apollonia/Sheena Easton/Vanity wannabe. She was so hot because she said was from East L.A.. and always wore her t-shirt with the shoulder exposed. I think she was a shitty singer!
#9 Jacqueline Stallone
She wasn’t in a cartoon but look at this bitch! She’s cazy!
#8 Pizzaz (Jem)
How can this slut not be on it? Pizzaz was always trying to fuck with Jem’s career, causing destruction and chaos wherever she went. She was especially hot because her birth name was PHYLLIS GABOR. I loved when this bitch would try to steal Jem’s boyfriend, Eric. She thought she was so fucking sexy, but she looks like an alligator on crack!
#7 Nanny (Muppet Babies)
Nanny had the hottest legs in show business! You never saw this slut, but you know that she resembled Polly Holliday or Barbara Billingsley.
#6 Brittany (Alvin and the Chipmunks)
Brittany was hot because she wore Danskins and acted like a bitch all the time! What few of you sluts realize is that Brittany is single handedly responsible for the creation of Brittany Spears! Look at how Brit Brit was influenced by her.
The only difference was, Brittany was never pregnant white trash!
#5 Crasher (Challenge of the GoBots)
For so many years I thought Crasher was a gay guy. Then I realized he was a she! But it’s a thin line anyway, isn’t it bitches? Anyway, Crasher sort of looks like Pete Burns and has a British accent. She always would laugh hysterically after stepping on people and causing destruction, like she was having an orgasm. She was the first 80s cartoon character into S&M!
#4 Cheetara (Thundercats)
Aside from beating people’s asses with her hot staff, Cheetara was a fucking porn star! Look at this picture from the first episode!
You can see her tits! I remember this freaked me out as a kid. It was the same sort of fascination and feeling when you’re doing something you are not supposed to, like looking at a copy of your brother’s (or mother's) issue of Hustler. I think her tits freaked so many kids out that they became fags! Holy shit, the right wing needs to start blaming Cheetara for gay marriage!
#3 Catra (She-Ra: Princess of Power)
How could we not include this bitch? She was always trying to defeat She-Ra but would always end up in a puddle of water or something. Catra was so hot because, despite being able to turn into a cat herself, she used to get carted around by her cat Clawdeen. The bitch is so self-entitled!
When you’d buy the action figure it described her as a “jealous beauty.” A few years ago some friends and I were going to start a band called CATRA: JEALOUS BEAUTY! Our first album was going to be called “Anxiety and Falcon Crest.” How hot would this whore be on the cover?
#2 Evil Lyn (He-Man and the Masters of the Universe)
The mother of all bitches! Every little boy was scared of her, unless they were gay in which case they wanted to be her! Evil-Lyn was Skeletor’s bitch but she really ran the roost. She always reminded me of Linda Dano. Look, isn’t the resemblance clear? Actually, Linda Dano sort of looks like Gozar from Ghostbusters.
Evil-Lyn is the only person on our list to be featured on the big screen in form of none other than the extremely scary MEG FOSTER. Meg, of course, is best known for her creepy eyes, Beverly D’Angelo wannabe look and for getting her ass fired from the Cagney and Lacey pilot! She’s so hot in the Masters of the Universe movie because she is a galatic conqueror and at one point kicks Courtney Cox’s ass!
#1 Bianca Dupree (Beverly Hills Teens)
Holy shit! The choice was clear—Bianca is #1! Beverly Hills Teens was a ridiculous cartoon from 1987 about super rich teens that all hung out at a country club and dated each other. Despite being loaded, they all wore the same fucking clothes everyday! Bianca was the rich bitch of the group and was so hot! She had a dog Fifi and a chauffeur Wilshire that loved her ass but she treated him like shit!
Bianca was always scheming to break up supercouple Troy and Lark and get Troy for herself. Seen her is that trifecta of power, along with some irritating short kid.
When I first met Michael K, one of the first things we talked about was how hot Bianca was! It bonded us forever. This is for you Michael K—long live Bianca!